Memoirs of an Evil Vizier
Translate into the Occidental
Translate into the Oriental
Greetings, dear readers. You know me only as a humble reseller of
An Introduction To My Music
A I Love You is my new pop album, to be released track by track. Listen below. For periodic updates
Chapter X - A Brief History of Paranormal Cosmetology
The next morning I rose very early and shook the invalid odalisque awake before I'd even finished tying my turban...
Chapter IX - Alternative Medicine
Whether you're a pirate or a pasha, or just a humble slave trader and aspiring evil vizier, when you see a zombie odalisque clawing at your window, your first impulse is...
Chapter VIII - Odalisque Autopsy
The first thing we heard was a dying woman’s scream. To be greeted thus when approaching a medical practice is, in conventional circumstances, a very poor sign indeed.
Chapter VII - Slaver on Holiday
I woke to a fine, bright morning, and lingered in bed watching sunlight filter through my thin curtains, contemplating the beautiful rugs on my walls, and idly plotting to win the sultan's confidence, become his evil vizier, and gain de facto control of his almost endless empire.
Chapter VI - How to Recover an Escaped Sex Slave Whose Shopping Adventure Is Much Longer than Practically Necessary
I searched everywhere: behind the bags of couscous and neatly hung tools of torture in my closet, under the elaborately decorated cushions of my sales reception room . . .
