Dispelling Beauty Lies: The Truth About Feminine Beauty

Dispelling Beauty Lies: The Truth About Feminine Beauty


The facts about feminine beauty are simple and intuitive, even obvious. But public discussion of the topic is dominated by lies that confuse many women. Oddly enough, intelligent women seem to be the most susceptible. This makes it harder for them to attract mates, subjects them to misguided self-doubts, and even damages their health. Their efforts to improve their appearance are in vain because they aim at the wrong target. All too often they simply give up on a game they could win if they understood the rules. But for fear of being impolite, men never correct their illusions.

In this comprehensive article I’ll dispel the confusion and tell you the straight truth about feminine attractiveness. In the closing section I’ll offer some practical advice. (Note: if you can't read the font, click the "translate" button above.)

A warning before you continue: I won't pander to boost your self-esteem. Writing the truth instead of repeating familiar lies will offend some readers. Most women will experience discomfort. If you're emotionally fragile or psychologically troubled, you should stop here.

However, learning the truth will enable clear-sighted women to improve their appearance and succeed at the game of beauty. This is a prize that's worth the cost. So keep the goal in mind as you read on. If you’re ready for real answers, these are the best you’ll find.

I. Everyone lies
II. Learning from love goddesses
III. Imaginary women
IV. The truth about breast size
V. Common and uncommon tastes
VI. Market forces
VII. The most important secret about faces
VIII. A note on masculine beauty
IX. "Beauty" and "hotness"
X. Correcting homework
XI. Drawing the right conclusions
XII. Reality-based beauty tips
XIII. Answering objections
Appendix: survey results
Afterword

I. Everyone lies

Why are lies about beauty abundant?

Beauty is so socially important that almost everyone has a reason to lie about it.

The fashion industry uses tall, ultra-thin models to impress and intimidate customers. The tactic increases clothing sales, but these models aren’t the best examples of beauty. Similarly, paid beauty writers and influencers make their money from advertising fashion and beauty products. The conflict of interest discourages them from giving accurate advice.

Body-positive influencers sometimes praise the beauty of unhealthy figures in a way that seems disconnected from reality. They expand their audience through flattery and pandering, not honesty. Journalists lie about beauty to bolster their favorite social and political causes, which they consider far more important than the truth.

Market forces compel even well-meaning people in the beauty industry to endorse conventional lies instead of providing all the help they could. As one cosmetic surgeon informed me with regret, “You can't tell women the truth because they'll crucify you. You'll go out of business.”

He gave them honest advice.

Men have incentives to lie about what attracts them as well. To be polite, or to flatter. Or even to show their good taste. Pretending not to notice overt sex appeal is a way of signaling refinement and class. It implies that they’re subtler and more perceptive than other men. But it also projects a false picture of what they really want.

Men who can't get what they want will claim to want what they can get in order to improve their chances at sex.

Some insecure women deride any concept of beauty that doesn't match what they see in the mirror. Unable to acknowledge their own imperfections, they hope words alone can make them the fairest of all. Others intentionally promote beauty lies with fabrications, malicious gossip, and petty insults directed at their more attractive competitors.

Even the most beautiful and self-assured women will lie, whether to guard their secrets, to sabotage their competitors, or because they don’t really know the answers themselves.

Are you sure you can trust her?

Self-deception compounds the problem. Once you're invested in the lies you've been told by marketers, flatterers, and competitors, it's psychologically difficult to accept the truth. You're tempted to behead the messenger and cling to feeble counterarguments you wouldn't take seriously in any other context. And your friends tell you what you want to hear, because their only alternative is to hurt and offend someone they love.

"Of course you look pretty today."

“What makes a woman attractive?” is a milgram question. In other words, the social penalty for an unflattering answer is much higher than the reward for telling the truth. Because of this we simply can’t trust the answers we receive, even if they’re coming from friends.

"I think you'd look good in short hair."

In sum, everyone’s lying about beauty. And when you consider the motivations I’ve just listed, it shouldn’t be a surprise. We have very good reasons to lie!

“Your highness, I’m afraid we made a point of hiring astrologers and diviners who specialize in precisely the kind of predictions which cannot be verified until after their pensioned retirement.”

All these lies can carry over into science. Scientific studies of beauty are often based on questionnaires. The scientists just perform a statistical analysis and repackage the results as verified truth. But survey responses on sexual topics are unreliable. Fancy mathematical language might make these studies sound authoritative, but it can't transform a collection of false answers into a true one. And there's a limit to how well a handful of numbers can characterize beauty.

So to reveal the truth about feminine attractiveness I won’t rely on surveys or professed opinions. Instead I’ll present direct evidence of men’s real preferences.

Feminine beauty painted by Lord Leighton, a wealthy heir and baron, in 1857.

Why should men be the ones to judge what's beautiful? My approach here is simple and practical, not philosophical. The main purpose of personal beauty is to attract and satisfy a member of the opposite sex. There are other reasons to be beautiful, but they make a much smaller contribution to human happiness. That means men are the most important judges of feminine beauty, just as women are the most important judges of masculine beauty.

"He has nice shoulders, but I just can't get used to his face."

Your professors may have taught you to loathe the "male gaze." This crazy attitude will do you more harm than good. In fact, it's far worse than a beauty lie. You can't win by condemning the judges. Instead you should embrace your potential for beauty, and use it to cultivate a fulfilling romantic and sexual relationship.

Men: believe it or not, you don't have to behead them.

Some claim an uncompromising analysis of feminine beauty is inherently misogynistic. This is quite opposite to the truth. Empowerment is about being able to get what you want. The more beauty you have, the easier it is to get what you want. And the better you understand beauty, the easier it is to obtain it. It's that simple.

Contrary to what you've been told, the vilification of the male gaze hurts women more than men. I'll explain why this is the case further on.

Those who justify dishonesty by labelling the truth misogynistic are taking advantage of you. They're disempowering you and implying women are too fragile to handle reality. This article, in contrast, aims to help any woman who's ready to open her eyes.

Pretty lies won't make you pretty. Nor strong, nor free. They'll only lock you in chains of your flatterers' design.

II. Learning from love goddesses

Let’s begin with the most enduring visual examples of feminine beauty: love goddesses. The representations below were created hundreds or even thousands of years apart by groups that spoke different languages and lived in different climates. Despite differences in their style, function, and degree of realism, they share common features.

The love goddesses typically have an hourglass figure, with a small waist, larger than average breasts, and pronounced hips. They have a moderate, healthy weight: fairly slim, but not skinny.

This Indian statue is two thousand years old.

These two Minoan examples are more than three thousand years old.

This Babylonian love goddess is nearly four thousand years old.

Below are erotic odalisque paintings from 19th century America, France, and Italy.

Rubens is often cited as a counterexample to conventional beauty standards. But his corpulent figures, such as the last image below, are exceptions in a long history of painted love goddesses that fit the general trend. Outliers like this don't nullify the rule.

Obese prehistoric figurines like the 30,000-year-old “Venus of Willendorf” are also frequently raised as counterexamples. But they don't qualify as love goddesses. The “Venus” appellation is arbitrary and disputed by scholars. These figurines weren't found with a label, and their true meaning and function are unknown.

There is, for that matter, no shortage of ancient figurines which do exhibit the hourglass shape common in verifiable love-goddess representations.

In the next gallery you’ll find a selection of famous cartoons of attractive women that spans several decades: Sleeping Beauty, Jasmine, Jessica Rabbit, and three popular Japanese anime characters.

These images are in some cases exaggerated, but that’s the nature of cartoon art. On the other hand, social conventions set limits on the figures "serious" artists could depict. For instance, critics condemned William Etty's Venus and her Satellites (below) as pornographic in the 1830s.

"A brothel on fire would be a modest exhibition in comparison," declared The Observer of this Venus painting. "An egregious error," wrote The Times. "Obsessed with breasts and bums," said Constable.

Most paintings and sculptures are sexually understated, partly because they’re made for public display in places where it would be inappropriate to inspire lust, and partly because unrestrained sex appeal would dominate men's attention and distract them from subtler elements of the artwork.

Despite these limitations, the cartoons, paintings, and sculptures of love goddesses share the same salient characteristics.

Cultural and regional variations do exist, but are smaller than you might assume. For instance, the ideal women preferred by American and Japanese men are more similar than real American and Japanese women!

Finally, here are three of the goddesses juxtaposed with human models.

So love goddesses and archetypes of beauty follow a pattern. However, they're not all identical. For instance, classical Greek statues don't have the small waist and wide hips evident in our other examples. Nor do the later Venuses copied from them.

While the persistence of this particular deviation was partly driven by a founder effect, its original motive is open to debate. Many influential artists were homosexual, perhaps including Botticelli himself, and this was surely a factor in ancient times as well.

Nevertheless, the exceptions are real and can't all be dismissed so easily.

Historical artwork may be compelling, but it's not enough to make a strong case. Furthermore, we can't rule out the possibility that current tastes differ from traditional ones. To reliably determine what men find attractive today, we'll have to examine more evidence.

The Temptation of Buddha, 1921.

III. Imaginary women

If men won’t tell the truth when asked what they find attractive, how can we ever know? One way is to look at what they choose in secret when they're free to have exactly what they want.

AI girls: an oncoming erotic terminator—with valuable lessons to teach.

Humans are imperfect by nature. So in real life men rarely have the option to pick exactly what they want, and compromise is the norm. To avoid hurting feelings they publicly pretend their compromise was their ideal all along. Imaginary substitutes, however, allow men to bypass the limitations of reality and get something that actually does look just like their ideal.

The best guides to men's real beauty preferences, therefore, are imaginary women selected in private. These fall into three main categories: sex dolls, erotic drawings, and computer-generated women like those above. In this section I'll analyze each in turn.

It would be a mistake to dismiss all imaginary women as mere sex objects. Some are intended to represent idealized romantic partners, much like the heroes of romance novels written for women.

Women are typically loathe to give credence to any of these privately imagined ideals. Not only are they incurious, they actively turn away from them to avoid knowing. This is an unfortunate mistake.

AI-generated erotic art. Don't close your eyes to the facts.

Putting your head in the sand may soothe your ego in the short term, but in the long term ignorance will do you harm. So please set aside your squeamishness and skepticism for a moment. There will be plenty of time later to debate the value of the evidence.

Statues and paintings also depict imaginary women, but they're designed for public display and with other functions in mind. This makes them imperfect models of attractiveness.

I’ve researched sex doll inventories at four online stores. Below I'll tell you what I found, starting with a little math you can skim over if you wish.

In mathematical terms, the most popular sex dolls at the four retailers had a waist to bust ratio of 0.61, and a waist to hip ratio of 0.61 too. In normal bust-waist-hips clothing measurements, that’s equivalent to 39-24-39. To check this number I averaged the measurements of over two hundred sex dolls from the inventory of one retailer. The resulting proportions were 0.65 and 0.61 respectively, equivalent to 37-24-39. By contrast, the average Victoria’s Secret lingerie model has a waist to bust ratio of 0.75, a waist to hip ratio of 0.71, and clothing measurements of 32-24-34.

Not the body type men find most attractive.

The exact numbers aren't especially important here. In plain language, the majority of men choose dolls with far more pronounced curves than lingerie models.

As you can see, the typical sex doll resembles the example images in the previous section, while the runway model is distinctly different: not only thinner, but also narrower at both the hips and chest. The runway model's greater height also causes her body to seem more elongated.

The differences are evident from the rear as well. In addition to wider hips, the typical sex doll has far thicker buttocks and thighs than a runway model, with no thigh gap. The overall appearance is rounded instead of flat.

Sex dolls might be inherently tawdry, but the example below shows their basic shape is both beautiful and respectable in a woman with the right clothing and presentation, even when judged by very conservative standards. In fact, sex dolls are much closer to the classic female figure of traditional painting than fashion models are.

You can see the same shape in these photos of vintage actress Sophia Loren, who measures 38-24-38. Her figure is classic, beautiful, and elegant, not trashy or cheap. She looks good in many different styles, including formal and business attire.

How can we confirm our observations? Let's consider erotic drawings. This is another case where men can choose exactly what they want, privately and without compromises.

The figures in modern erotic drawings again share basic similarities with those found in traditional paintings, but they're less limited by social restrictions on sexual expression.

The imaginary proportions of fictional women in manga and anime intended to appeal to men are strikingly similar to those of sex dolls. Fourteen female characters selected from the most popular erotic animes have a purported median waist to bust ratio of 0.62 and a median waist to hip ratio of 0.64, equivalent to clothing measurements of 39-24-37. Of course, the drawings themselves can be far more outlandish than these imaginary numbers. You can see an example figure below.

This character has fictional measurements equivalent to 40-24-38.

The rear view of popular erotic anime girls also confirms our observations. Just like sex dolls, their legs have a rounded shape and no thigh gap. They're thicker than many women expect.

Height is widely thought to have little effect on feminine beauty. The average sex doll is exactly as tall as the average woman worldwide, and the range of variation is close to that seen in the female population. This supports the conventional view.

Fashion models' height doesn't make them more beautiful, but it does ensure that average women's attempts to copy their look will be futile. You can't obtain a tall person's elongated figure by losing weight.

Nevertheless, height still causes confusion. Fashion models aren't just tall in absolute terms. They also have a low width to height ratio that makes them look reedy. Fashion marketing encourages women to believe these elongated proportions are the most beautiful. But that's not the case.

A visual examination of AI girls makes this clear. In the examples above and below, I've elongated or shortened a typical AI girl's body to imitate the height difference between an average woman and a runway model.

Some women assume the tall images at right are the most attractive. But the center images are the ones actually created by AI artists.

Erotic drawings show considerable variation, but usually look closer to the center figures above than the left or right ones. Sex dolls, on the other hand, do tend to be more elongated, albeit not to the extent of runway models.

This difference may just be the result of doll manufacturers' efforts to economize on material costs for a given height. Nevertheless, the inconsistency and variability suggest that even if men do prefer a particular width to height ratio, it's not especially important, and considerable deviation from the mean is acceptable. Elongated proportions aren't more beautiful than normal ones, but they're not ugly either.

Long legs in particular are sometimes cited in movies and the media as exemplifying sex appeal. So you might assume that even though an elongated torso doesn't contribute to attractiveness, long legs still do. But once again, this has no basis in reality. It's just fiction invented for movies. Men care about the sizes and shapes of butts and thighs. They don't care about leg length. That's why AI girls are typically cropped above the knees. You can verify this by scanning through the images provided.

You'll also notice that imaginary women tend to have plump thighs. If you compare arms and thighs you'll see this isn't just a matter of being heavy. Most men prefer thin arms, with fat deposits located specifically in the thighs.

While there isn't universal agreement, the majority of men really do prefer thick thighs. Garter belts and stockings are often found on AI girls because they draw attention to thigh plumpness.
Real-World Side-Effects of Height

All else being equal, taller women look less curvaceous than women of average height, whereas shorter women look more curvaceous. Because imaginary women are already quite curvaceous, shortening them can sometimes produce unusual extremes, and elongating them does little harm. But in the real world, where few have all the feminine curves men desire, this side-effect is more likely to work to the advantage of short women and the disadvantage of tall ones.

Sex dolls don't really have an age, but it's worth asking what age they appear to be. I circulated a dozen photos of randomly selected dolls on social media and asked readers to guess. The median estimate was twenty-two. So peak attractiveness appears to occur in the early twenties. You can see these dolls in the gallery below and make your own estimate.

A major retailer categorizes 25% of their dolls as “teen,” 12% as “MILF,” and 63% as standard. If most men really preferred teenagers, as some claim, we'd expect most sex dolls to be listed in the teen category. But that isn't the case. In fact, teens are only twice as popular as "MILFs."

Even so, some signs of age are unequivocally bad. While a few sex dolls do have gray hair, none have obvious wrinkles. This suggests the variance in men's taste for youthfulness is rather limited. You can see a “MILF” doll below.

Sex dolls in the "MILF" category don't look old.

Anime girls have very young faces and very adult bodies, and they're drawn in an unrealistic style. By consequence it's impossible to determine their age.

How old is she?

The confusing combination of a juvenile face and a sexually mature body isn't an accident, however. It's common in AI-generated erotic imagery as well. When they were shown the following AI-generated image in two pieces, men estimated her face to be around sixteen and her body to be around twenty-four.

Similarly, the thirtysomething model below accrued millions of followers by using a "teen" AI filter to make her face look much younger than her body. Oddly enough, men rarely notice the incongruity before it's pointed out. To see the unclothed images they're paying for, click here. The real, unfiltered model is circled in red at the bottom of the page.

So men typically prefer the combination of a neotenous face and a mature body.

While imaginary women can take it to extremes never found in reality, some of the most attractive real women exhibit the same traits. "Early twenties" isn't a magic number that men fetishize. It just happens to be the age where this combination is most likely to occur.

This might lead you to wonder: what about the small fraction of men who truly prefer women without mature curves? At the time of writing AI-generated images are new and not subject to legal action or deletion, so they can provide an answer that was unavailable in the past, and may be unavailable again in the future.

The great majority of AI girls have pronounced curves.

Around 3% of the sexualized images found under the #aigirl hashtag have neither adult faces nor adult bodies. I evaluated 350 images and included only indisputable cases, so this number errs on the side of understatement.

As underage AI girls may be removed from public channels at any time, I make no guarantee you'll be able to replicate the numbers just given.

AI girls who lack curves almost never possess the tall, lanky figure of runway models. Instead they look juvenile, and indeed underage. Due to the nature of these images, I'm not going to take the legal risk of showing examples. They reveal a notable overlap between men who are indifferent to curves and men who prefer children to adults.

More generally, because feminine curves aren't fully grown until adulthood, there's reason to suppose that men with a stronger preference for youth will tend to prefer less developed curves, while men who prefer more developed curves will tend to be less concerned about age. Tension between these preferences may explain some of the variation in men's tastes.

Many historical cultures favored earlier marriages than are now considered permissible, so they necessarily imputed greater sexual value to immature figures as well. Nevertheless, at present the fraction of men who prefer children's bodies is quite low, and the taste for a well-developed adult body is the norm, despite disagreement about the ideal degree of development.

Concluding qualifications are in order. The fact that men today perceive peak attractiveness to occur in the early twenties on average doesn't imply that everyone peaks at the same age. Nor does it imply that a younger woman is always more beautiful than her seniors, nor least of all that beauty "hits a wall" at age thirty. Peak and slope are not the same thing.

As I'll explain near the end of this article, there's still hope for older women. So please be patient and keep reading whatever your age.

This actress made very successful movies driven by her sex appeal in her late 30s.

Some people object to the idea of using sex dolls, erotic drawings, and AI girls to reveal men's preferences. They claim imaginary women in general, and sex dolls in particular, are the refuge of low-value men, and because of this they're not a reliable indicator of broader male tastes. However, you may have noticed that ice cream tastes good to the young and old, the rich and the poor alike. So it is with many types of beauty.

"Only low-value men think cherry blossoms are pretty."

What distinguishes sexually successful men from unsuccessful ones isn't their basic sense of the female form, but rather their ability to obtain it. A broad network of evidence, including love goddesses and erotic oil paintings commissioned by wealthy aristocrats, tells the same story about feminine beauty. And we'll expand this evidence further as we continue. Dismissing all of it is simply wishful thinking, usually motivated by insecurity.

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The patrician taste for enormous butts.

The restored and colorized video footage above shows upper-class women walking at a park in 1902. Traditional aristocratic clothing was designed to create a pronounced hourglass surpassing even today's most generously proportioned sex dolls. Those who deride the taste for curves evident in imaginary women as low-class or porn-induced are historically ignorant. If they wish to engage in snobbery, they shouldn't do it by advertising the plebian quality of their education.

Too small for genuine patricians?

It's important to understand that imaginary women actually give us a more accurate picture of male preferences than real glamour models. That’s because if men prefer multiple uncorrelated traits on the tail of the distribution in the female population, even the best real models will necessarily be a compromise with the mean. The same argument applies a fortiori to pornographic actresses, who are drawn from the very small population of willing participants, and thus unlikely to represent the ideal. This is a consequence of statistical laws, not male desire, and it leads us to underestimate the demand for rare traits.

So real glamour models can indicate the direction of male preferences, but not their extent. Imaginary women aren’t subject to the same limitation. This makes them especially useful for answering our next question.

IV. The truth about breast size

Women frequently ask: what breast size do men really prefer? Of all the questions about attractiveness, this is the one where men are most likely to lie when asked directly. In fact, they lie so often that some women begin to doubt the obvious answer.

This anecdote shouldn't be surprising. Men lie to flatter you, and those with extreme tastes are the most likely to lie.

A professor thoroughly reviewed the scientific research on size preferences for a major periodical. He concluded that men prefer average breasts, and women are fooling themselves into believing size matters.

Some girls might be inclined to believe intellectual authorities like this professor instead of stereotypes and common sense. But they shouldn't. He's wrong.

Once again we can learn the truth if we look at what men actually choose in private. A large online sex doll retailer categorizes their dolls by breast size. The frequency of these sizes is as follows:

Frequency of breast sizes at a large online sex doll retailer. 21% small, 27% medium, 37% large, 14% huge (n=971). “Small” refers to a B-cup or less. For visual examples, see the next gallery.

Note that the terminology they use is misleading, since "small" refers to the average size of a slim woman, and "medium" is already large by everyday standards. That means around 80% of men choose what we normally call big breasts. Here are examples of each size according to the retailer's classification.

A second retailer categorizes dolls by cup size. The distribution of their inventory is visualized in the next graph. The result is essentially the same, but we can add a few additional details to our observations:

  • Only 2% of men want an A-cup.
  • 90% of men want more than a B-cup.
  • 78% of men want "large" breasts (D-cup or more).
  • The average man wants an E- or F-cup.
  • 43% of men want a G-cup or more.

Below you'll find similar data drawn from an anime image site, once again followed by examples of each size. Men's order of preference is exactly the same as above. However, among this audience "large" breasts have an even bigger advantage over the other sizes.

Breast sizes of the most popular anime images (n=182) in a very extensive archive (n=1,654,169) over a 30-day period. 14% small, 21% medium, 59% large, 5% huge. For visual examples, see the next gallery.

Cartoons are prone to exaggeration, so we can't assume these translate directly to reality. Nor should we assume they don't. Fortunately exactness isn't necessary for our purposes here. From the evidence above we can draw three reliable conclusions that will hold even if our data is imprecise.

Women have no innate appreciation for this look, so they systematically underestimate its value to men. Remember, if men liked the same things you do, they'd be gay.

First, male preferences for breast size vary a great deal. Not all men prefer big breasts. Some prefer small, others enormous.

Second, the demand for larger sizes is much greater than the supply. The average male already prefers a size rarely found in nature, and the gap between supply and demand increases with size, without any practical limit.

Will your boyfriend admit how much he likes this photo?

This means that “bigger is better” is true in an economic sense even if it isn’t true in an absolute sense. In simple terms, the most buxom women are highly valued because there aren’t enough of them to go around, not because all men prefer them.

Third, the median preference is broadly similar to the size we’ve seen in earlier examples, and conforms to well-known stereotypes. It’s also close to the size of common glamour models like “page 3” girls or centerfolds. In fact, some vintage centerfolds (NSFW) are larger than most sex dolls, despite the extreme rarity of this size in the general population. So are these storefront mannequins designed to attract passersby.

When we consider both overall clothing measurements and bust size, here’s what the median sex doll looks like.

“Miss Average”
Flatness: Connecting the Dots

The fraction of sex dolls with an A-cup (2%) is quite similar to the fraction of sexualized images depicting children's bodies that we cited in the previous section (3%). This suggests a flat chest is desired mainly as part of a suite of juvenile features.
Almost all flat AI girls (not shown) look underage.

You might still be tempted to dismiss these conclusions because they're derived from an analysis of imaginary women. So I’ll now draw your attention to the top 50 uncensored image-search results for “best breasts” (NSFW). This search was conducted anonymously using Tor to avoid contaminating the results with any past history.

Estimated sizes of the top 50 uncensored search results for "best breasts." 2% small (A-B), 18% medium (C-D), 80% large or huge (E+).

Large breasts are the most common result by a wide margin, and only a single image shows an A-cup. The first model resembles the median sex doll above. An uncensored search for older images yields a very similar outcome.

Of course, search results can fluctuate depending on the precise terms used, the search engine, and the degree of censorship. In Bing, censorship and term variation increases the average bust size from large to huge. Google skews results toward celebrity gossip unless you use an explicit term. Yahoo falls somewhere in between. But no matter how you search, big always comes out ahead.

While you shouldn't put much faith in search results on their own, they do add more evidence to an already voluminous pile. And it turns out that sex dolls actually give us a moderate and conservative representation of male taste. This article may draw on imaginary women, but the conclusions are quite real.

Skeptics are thus faced with an impossible question: if guys don't like large breasts, why do they keep seeking them out when you're not looking?

Men almost universally understate their breast-size preferences to make average girls happy.

Some just can't accept the fact that a substantial majority of men prefer well-endowed women. Feeling their self-esteem is at stake, they resort to flimsy fallback positions. The most popular of these is “But rich men prefer small breasts.” This is no more plausible than the claim that rich women prefer poorly endowed men. If women with wealthy husbands really believed it, they'd hire maids with double-Ds to protect their marriages. But they don't.

The most popular erotic anime image on the day these words were written. The perfect maid to keep your wealthy husband faithful?

It's easy to explain the supposed class difference in breast size preference. Status conscious men feign indifference to the obvious in order to signal their refinement. Then flat-chested women who fear they can't compete on the basis of sex appeal amplify the claim to stigmatize a trait they don't possess and slander their competitors as peasants.

They're lying for their own gain. And they're guilty of hypocrisy too, because women's analogous attraction to size is at least as strong as men's.

Self-Serving Fallacies

When women who are insecure about their appearance lash out, their sometimes lengthy tirades can usually be reduced to one selfish claim:

“Men who don't think I'm the hottest are bad people.”

Naturally they allow exceptions for women who resemble them in the ways they consider relevant. Then they try to build a social consensus about this badness, definitionally excluding counterexamples. Their aim is to inflate their own value while harming other women they feel inadequate to compete with through fair means. The claim that “men who like big boobs are low class and if you disagree you are too” is merely one instance among many.

Common sense, stereotypes, search results, AI images, sex dolls, anime girls, and vintage centerfolds all agree. It doesn't matter if men deny it to be polite or to impress you with their refinement. The evidence they're attracted to large breasts is overwhelming. In practice, bigger is better.

So what do "perfect" breasts actually look like? I asked men to submit photos of large breasts with a perfect shape and then vote on their favorites. You can see the most popular images here (NSFW). Men's top choices look remarkably similar.

This section on breast size constitutes only 5% of the article you're reading. Unfortunately some critics are so obsessed with it that they've convinced themselves my entire website is devoted to the topic.

If you're poorly endowed, don't despair. There are many elements of beauty, and breast size is only one of them. Later in this article I'll offer some words of encouragement, and also discuss whether cosmetic surgery might be a viable option.

Cup Size Isn't A Perfect Measurement, But That Doesn't Change Anything

Because band size varies and letters have a different meaning in different countries, they're not a perfect guide to breast size. To accurately understand men's preferences you should refer to the visual examples instead of obsessing about letters. The letters are only cited for the sake of convenience in the absence of more precise measurements.

V. Common and uncommon tastes

The diverse examples we’ve examined so far point toward a common male taste. This common taste is remarkably consistent between times and places.

To summarize, most men are attracted to women with a small waist, large breasts, a rounded rear, and prominent hips. They prefer women who have pronounced curves but aren’t overweight or obese. There is no evidence they favor the extreme thinness and tall, elongated figure of fashion models. In fact, the shape preferred by men is strikingly different from the shape of fashion models.

Above center: a popular glamour model. Above left and right: two of Vogue’s “top fifteen models.”

The average woman is also strikingly different from fashion models, and resembles a sex doll more than a runway model, as the following table of measurements shows.

The average woman from 1951 is four or five inches wider than runway models in every measurement. Yet her bust and hips are almost the same as those of sex dolls or anime girls. Many women worry about their hips needlessly. Waist size and cup size are the main factors that set an attractive figure apart from an average one.

Women assume they can see through fashion marketing and other beauty lies, and will claim to know that men like curves. But they're often confused about what "men like curves" really means. They may envision lingerie models in push-up bras, or actresses whose curves fall well short of the proportions men prefer. These media representations of sex appeal aren't accurate.

Note that the drawings above don't simply have larger breasts than the models and actresses, but also wider hips, thicker legs, and higher bodyfat. And this pattern isn't limited to the most popular images. The next chart shows how common each category is overall.

You can see the same pattern in the images below, which compare typical models for a famous "sexy" lingerie brand to similarly dressed women whom most men would find more appealing.

The gap between women's intuitions about what's attractive and men's actual preferences is most pronounced at the extremes. The unusually curvaceous woman below was rated "hot" by 91% of men, but only 60% of women.

To guess what men want, you should use reason, not just intuition. Women consistently underestimate the appeal of feminine curves, so when in doubt, assume that more is more.

More is more popular than you think.

One major sex doll retailer sells over a hundred detachable heads, and only a single headless body. This limitation gives them a strong incentive to offer a body with proportions that will please the largest possible number of men and offend the fewest, and gives us a perfect opportunity to visualize the common male taste. You can see it here (NSFW). Now you have an accurate picture.

(Long after the previous paragraph was written, the retailer added two more torsos made by a different brand, shown in the gallery above. As you can see, the range of variation is quite limited.)

An evil vizier explaining the hourglass.

The voluptuous hourglass figure preferred by so many men is a well-known stereotype, but oddly excluded from magazines and media that address the topic of fashion and beauty for women. The narrow and skinny ideal that replaces it is both less attainable and less attractive.

Some women feel compelled to make excuses for the errors of the beauty industry. It's Stockholm syndrome. They claim a boyish figure is what women really want, and that rail-thin models are necessary to put clothes on display effectively. These defenses are absurd.

A real ad for women's clothing. Competing with other women to achieve a fashionable appearance nobody actually likes will only bring sorrow.

It's a verifiable fact that most influential fashion designers aren't attracted to women. It would be unreasonable to assume this has no impact on their tastes, and also unreasonable to assume their tastes have no influence on their work.

The claim that designers choose models who resemble boys because "they're like walking coat hangers and better for showing off women's clothing" is already implausible at first blush. There's simply no reason women's clothes would look better on hangers than on women's bodies unless they're not properly designed for women's bodies. But the deeper you look, the more farfetched this stock defense sounds. Indeed, it's exactly the kind of lie you would tell if you wanted to remove the female form from the runway. When you trust male gays over the male gaze, you should expect to be misled in particular ways.

The images below reveal a double standard. While male fashion models have pronounced masculine sexual traits, female fashion models have diminished feminine sexual traits. In other words, designers promote men who look like men, and women who look like (or are) boys. What's most astonishing is that they've convinced the public to swallow this.

The fashion world's de facto campaign against the female form has been so effective that today most women think the model on the right below is a weird and abnormal example of feminine beauty, whereas the model on the left is a good and admirable one. They've quite literally been trained to believe that men make more beautiful women than women. When they double down and denounce those who prefer the female model as “misogynistic,” one doesn't know whether to laugh or cry.

Some will admit runway models are prone to excess, yet believe they can find the correct answer by averaging these two figures. That's lazy thinking. Averaging a wrong answer and a right one just gives you another wrong answer.

Model for a major online retailer. Is the fashion world repulsed by the female form?

In sharp contrast to fashion designers' vision of beauty, consider the vintage romance covers below. These novels were written by women and cater to women's fantasies. Some of the covers were painted by women as well. The protagonists resemble sex dolls more than fashion models or actresses. And this doesn't prevent their dresses from being very appealing to men and women alike.

The fashion world has created a negative-sum game with arbitrary rules. They grant women status points for achieving a boyish look that's both taxing to maintain and unattractive to the majority of the population. But when free to dream their own private dreams, it seems women would rather have a curvaceous, feminine figure that satisfies the common male taste. They want to be loved and lusted after, not just held up as trophies for public display.

Shoulder pads increase the shoulder-waist ratio, a primary component of masculine beauty, instead of improving the waist-hip and waist-breast ratios, primary components of feminine beauty. Is it any wonder fashion designers like them so much?

There's no denying that the particular type of ugliness promoted by the fashion industry can increase a woman's status in some subcultures today. And if society were less interconnected, it would be amusing to let so-called "elites" continue mimicking gay beauty ideals to impress each other for another hundred years. But this same influence is pushing all women to make poorer choices, look worse, and enjoy life less than they could.

Because today's fashionable ideals are doing real harm to public welfare, they need to be harshly criticized until their influence is ended. Realigning socially approved aesthetic goals with genuine beauty, as revealed in men's true, private preferences, will have enormous benefits whose full extent will only be appreciated in retrospect.

"Status gruel" is an unenjoyable aesthetic experience pursued for its social signaling value.
Status Gruel

A renowned chef at an exclusive restaurant serves thin gruel in beautiful porcelain bowls. It doesn't taste good and it's not nourishing. But any diner who says so out loud will seem uncultivated. Instead they eat it up, and then ask for more to show how refined they are. They praise her gruel so consistently that the chef begins to think they actually enjoy it, and she makes it even thinner.

So it is in the realm of feminine beauty. Thin fashion models are status gruel presented in pretty bowls.
Status-seekers are castrating themselves to prove their superiority. Have they convinced you?

Of course, not all men are looking for an hourglass. Uncommon tastes are quite real. Everyone knows there are some who prefer the petite, girlish look, or the tomboy look, or the extravagantly well-endowed look shown above, even though these tastes aren’t pervasive enough to be reflected in the statues of love goddesses. And a few men really do prefer runway models or Rubenesque figures.

Below you can see a random selection of AI-generated images posted on social media under the "#AIgirl" hashtag. While most of them match the common male taste, the remainder cater instead to the minority tastes I've just mentioned.

Unfortunately, some writers become too enamored of relativism. They use these real minority tastes to justify the pretense that the norm doesn’t exist and doesn’t matter. Then they go on to claim that everything is beautiful. This lazy attitude is intended to flatter your self-esteem, not help you succeed. You shouldn’t trust it.

"A Balanced Figure"

Balance is less important than women assume. A full hourglass may be the most popular figure. But men value top-heavy and bottom-heavy figures more highly than a balanced banana figure that lacks curves. People mainly like to praise balance because it sounds so respectable. "More is more" or "something is better than nothing" are closer to the truth.
Men will find her legs attractive whether or not her cup size matches them.

VI. Market forces

Beauty might be relative. Does that mean anything goes? Practically speaking, no. Consider supply and demand.

To catch and please a mate, it’s advantageous to have traits whose demand exceeds the supply. It’s disadvantageous to have traits whose supply exceeds the demand. (Where taste is concerned, the reverse is true. That is, you'll have an easier time getting what you want if there's an oversupply of potential mates who match your taste.)

For example, there are more men who prefer a small waist than there are women who have one. So women with a small waist have a relatively easy time finding a mate. In contrast, only a few men prefer obese women. There are far more obese women than there are men who prefer them, so they have a hard time finding a mate. And even if they succeed, they may be treated carelessly, because they're easily replaced. Don't behead the messenger. This is the cruelty of Mother Nature.

"Pretenders who think they can break into my industry just by kidnapping a few virgins and setting up an auction block—after which they expect dinars will flower from the sand—are always quickly disappointed, and retreat to easier careers in the management of actresses, prostitutes, and singers."

The logic of supply and demand seems too cold and disturbing for some women to accept. But consider the alternatives. If we pretend beauty is objective and universal, we can't explain the variation in tastes. And if we pretend everyone is equally beautiful, we can't explain why some looks are valued more than others. Only an economic analysis respects differences and still accurately captures what we all observe. It's by far the most broad-minded way to make sense of human beauty.

While polls aren’t particularly reliable, the poll below gives a reasonable estimate of overall demand. The added black lines indicate approximate supply. The most advantageous traits are the ones with the biggest gap between these two.

According to the poll, the most advantageous set of traits is: hourglass figure, thin, oversized breasts, bubble butt. Once again, this matches the beauty examples we’ve given above. But the variety evident in the poll also shows that there’s more than one way to be attractive. It’s not necessary to conform to the majority taste to succeed.

"As soon as the sultan was settled into place, she surprised us all by starting her dance unbidden, swaying with the slow shimmy of experienced belly dancers."

The data we gathered earlier allowed us to establish a simple mathematical formula for the woman preferred by the median male: 37-24-39, F-cup, 22 years old. But supply and demand shifts the advantage away from this median toward rarer extremes, like the example below.

This image is divisive, with a substantial minority of men finding it very attractive, most being unimpressed, and a few dismissing it as gross. It's still a win on net. A market isn't a democracy where the majority vote prevails. A woman with this figure will be highly valued if she knows how to present herself well.

In fact, the appearance desired by the largest number of men isn't always the best. It's counterintuitive, but some women can have more success with rare looks the majority of men dislike! In these cases it's actually good to be weird.

Men most commonly prefer a small nose with a narrow bridge, sometimes upturned at a 30 degree angle. But a meaningful fraction actually prefer the nose above to the alternatives, provided it's on the right face. It's not necessary or interesting for all women to have the same nose.

Skeptical? The following illustration shows one way this can happen. If you can't follow this graph, don't worry. Just remember that you don't need to please everyone to be beautiful.

When the supply and demand for degrees of a given trait (e.g. butt size) fit normal curves with different means, it's best to “overshoot” the demand mean unless the demand curve has a much smaller standard deviation. This esoteric beauty tip is for brainy girls only.
Normie Envy

Some men who don’t share common male tastes refuse to accept that those tastes are indeed common. They wish to feel normal, and they fear that being in the minority makes them less manly. But that doesn’t follow. There’s no reason everyone should share identical preferences, and nothing wrong with being a minority. And by the same token, there's nothing wrong with appealing to men who have uncommon tastes.
Sporty girls are another minority taste, though a less common one than some women want to believe.

Nevertheless, rarity isn't sufficient to make everything valuable. When demand is too low, uncommon traits are still a real disadvantage. For instance, tattoos are a dubious choice even in subcultures where they've been normalized.

Pie chart of sex dolls with and without tattoos: 99.8% not tattooed, 0.2% tattooed (n=1,092). Tattoos are similarly rare in erotic drawings, paintings, and sculptures.

I'll address one additional remark about supply and demand to any men who might be reading.

Bidding up prices for the same goods doesn't increase real wealth.

Men typically try to improve the quality of the mates they can catch by raising the “price” they can afford to pay. That is, by improving themselves, their social position, or their skill at seduction. This is rational on an individual level. But it's actually a zero-sum game for men as a group.

Increasing the supply of beauty makes all of us richer.

Collectively, men can only catch better mates by improving the supply. In other words, by helping women to be the best they can be. Please keep this in mind before you engage in the battle of the sexes. The best world is a world where everyone wins.

Butt Size: Bigger Is Better, Despite Divided Opinions

Men broadly agree about the best butt shape, but disagree about the best size. Indeed, butt-size preferences vary between populations more than any other element of beauty. Data from sex dolls and anime girls suggests that around a third of men prefer large butts over small or medium. That's less than a majority. But because there are more men who desire them than women who have them, bigger is better anyway. Men who do prefer large butts assign them considerable importance.

I asked men to send me unclothed reference photos of the best large butt shape and then vote on their submissions. Here you can see the most popular photos. And here are larger submissions which are less popular, but rarer and therefore highly valued. Take special note of the extra rear projection evident in some of these images, as well as at left below. This is an attractive characteristic distinct from size.

Supply and demand isn't the only factor that shifts the most desirable appearance away from the median. Surprisingly, indifference does as well.

Suppose you're planning dinner with a friend. You don't care what you eat, but your friend insists on seafood. Naturally, you won't bother to argue. Seafood wins, because your friend cares and you don't. A similar effect applies to feminine beauty.

Do men who prefer blondes care more about hair color than men who prefer brunettes?

Whenever some men care about a trait others are indifferent to, the most valuable trait isn't the one that matches the median taste. It's the one that satisfies those who care. This applies in degrees as well, and impacts many salient traits, including age, nose shape, butt and breast size, hair length, hair color, and even eyebrows.

Since the men who care most about age prefer younger women, the indifference effect increases the value of youth.

Although the consequences vary, the indifference effect tends to benefit women who satisfy tastes for uncommon traits. Indifferent men create the illusion of an optimum closer to the average woman, because they're likely to choose common traits by default rather than genuine preference.

Any traits that some men like and the remainder are indifferent to will increase both a woman’s popularity and her market value, no matter how small the first group. The most valued look theoretically includes all such traits, regardless of median preferences.

Before we move on, let's pause to summarize this section in a few sentences. Median male tastes aren't a perfect guide to attractiveness. Women with rare traits that satisfy minority tastes are valued even if they're unpopular. And often they're more popular than women who match median tastes exactly. Because people neglect to consider market forces, they mistakenly believe the most advantageous appearance falls closer to the average than it really does.

More popular than you think.

VII. The most important secret about faces

Beauty lies aren't a serious problem when it comes to faces, so I'm not going to include a detailed analysis of facial beauty in this article. Instead I'll tell you the most important secret about faces.

It's no secret that men broadly agree on which faces are pretty and which are ugly. This implies that some underlying elements of facial beauty are universal. However, men aren't just searching for generically pretty faces. In fact, each man prefers a different and sometimes shockingly specific type of face.

I asked people to submit images of four faces they consider particularly attractive. Most chose faces that are unique, but also extremely similar to each other. Often so similar they could be mistaken for sisters, and occasionally so similar they could be mistaken for twins. You might not believe me yet, but you will after you see the example sets that follow.

Our first respondent chose four girls who look like sisters. The first two could almost be twins, and both of them are wearing glitter. Not just any glitter, but the same colors of glitter.

In the second example set we again have the impression of sisters. The first two are especially alike. When asked about this, the man who selected them replied:

Respondents consistently reported that they'd been unaware the faces they chose were similar. Some had trouble seeing obvious similarities even after they'd been explained. When it comes to our favorite faces, the sense of beauty seems to hamper our objectivity.

The girls in this third set couldn't be mistaken for sisters. In fact, they appear to have different ancestry. But while they're less obviously alike than the previous submissions, they still share common features.

The first two models have the same brow, eyes, cheeks, mouth, jawline, and chin. The fourth model is more similar to the first than she initially appears. When we superimpose photos taken at the same angle, their features match up so exactly that they create the impression of a single face.

And when we put two sets side by side, the differences are stark. It's incredibly easy to tell which faces belong together.

In the next set the first three faces are again similar in shape. They're all facing the camera directly and tilting their heads at the same angle. The image below superimposes two of them. Although one face is more elongated than the other, their features match.

They're also wearing the same expression. If you examine the previous examples again, you'll notice the faces there are wearing the same expressions too.

We see a slight smile in the first set, a tough glare in the second set, a sad pout in the third set, and a questioning gaze with parted lips in the fourth set.

One respondent included these three photos of women smiling in an identical fashion. The first two also have similar features, similar hairstyles, and similar poses.

Another submission included the two photos above, featuring a unique lopsided grin. The expression doesn't occur in any of the other examples, but this respondent chose it twice.

What's interesting about the next set is that the respondent selected four women from different parts of the world, but still managed to find two with both the same expression and the same face. The second is simply a wider version of the first.

Where facial preferences are concerned, matching features are more consistently important than matching ancestry. You can see another example of this below. Despite different origins, these four faces share very wide cheekbones, the same jaw and chin, the same hair, and noses of the same length.

Some respondents were sensitive to the mood of the images they chose. They submitted high-quality photographs with an artistic color scheme. Yet the first three faces in the tasteful black, white, and sepia photographs below are no less similar than the blurry selfies we examined earlier. In fact, this attention to aesthetic detail increases the impression of sameness.

You might assume the examples I've selected above are exceptional, but that isn't the case. Similar faces are the norm, and sister faces are common. Only a minority of submissions included four faces that were markedly different.

The faces in eclectic sets are frequently celebrities, so it's not unreasonable to imagine that external factors like laziness, the easy availability of photos, or the aura of fame sometimes motivated the choices. Still, we shouldn't rule out the possibility that they reveal genuine preferences. Some men may not have a "type."

One reader contacted me to say he didn't agree with my theory about faces. He argued the evidence was weak. So I asked him to submit his own set. Here's what he chose.

When I pointed out the similarities between his first two faces, he still disagreed. He told me the hands were a coincidence and the remaining two faces were actually very different, and submitted a new photo of the third face. To his mind, this new photo showed the resemblance was an illusion. Was he correct? I'll let you be the judge.

The preceding sections of this article demonstrated that most men share a common taste for the same female body shape. Bodily attractiveness is often as simple as having a smaller waist and larger breasts than other women. This is a very unromantic conclusion that suggests individuality has no relevance to feminine beauty.

Attractive bodies tend to be generic rather than meaningful expressions of individual character.

Below the neck, that conclusion isn't entirely false. Minority tastes do exist, but they're not very specific either. And because of unequal supply and demand, stereotypically desirable traits still end up being the most advantageous in practice.

Where faces are concerned, a much different picture emerges. As we've acknowledged, men usually agree on which faces are ugly and which are pretty. But they aren't just seeking any pretty face. They each have an individual taste for a specific ideal face that very few women match. And the face that's perfect to one man may be quite uninteresting to another. So much so that the man who compiled set three wouldn't bother pursuing any of the women in sets one and two. That's a very significant effect!

At this point you might be thinking, "Fine. I'm convinced men really do have weirdly specific visual tastes. But women aren't like that. Women mainly care about status and narrative." Not true. Female submissions show the same pattern.

This female respondent submitted three faces that could belong to brothers, as well as a fourth half-brother. The first two are especially close, including the style of facial hair and squinting eyes.

This second female respondent drew on radically different sources but still came up with a complete set of brothers. The second and third faces could almost be twins and are posing at the same angle with the same expression and the same hair. When submitting these faces she wrote, "It's partially the physical attractiveness, but much more so everything else surrounding them (character, story, status etc.) that makes them stand out."

No objective observer could draw that conclusion. Certainly such factors influenced her selection. But even taking into account their shared ancestry, these are extraordinarily similar faces on a purely visual level. Her self-analysis implies that our unique facial preferences influence us subconsciously.

Fated lovers are actually real?

If we're each seeking specific and uncommon faces, good matches are rare and special, and effectively determined in advance. So the romantic idea that relationships are both individualized and predestined isn't far from the truth. Strangely enough, we go through life completely unaware of this, and invent other justifications for our choices. The right faces seem so meaningful to us that we can't believe we loved them because of an arbitrary visual preference.

Despite the incredible diversity of female faces submitted, fewer than 1% have short hair. Nearly all men agree that short hair is unattractive. Faces without makeup are equally rare.

In sum, to catch a mate it's not enough to be beautiful. You need to match his taste. If someone is indifferent to you, it doesn't necessarily mean that you're plain or have an unlikeable personality. You may just not have the right face for him. In such cases it's best to accept fate and move on.

These facts about faces are important and clear up many mysteries about beauty and romance. They should be made common knowledge. Yet as far as I'm aware, this is the first time they've been systematically explained.

Fashionable Face Errors

While most fashion models do have good faces, the fashion world still has a tendency toward masculinization you should be wary of. Fashionable faces show a higher incidence of rectangular structure and hollow cheeks than the faces preferred by men. Attractive female faces typically have a rounded structure, a modest jaw and chin, and a small nose with a narrow bridge, slightly upturned. Their cheeks are full, and often form a heart shape, whereas masculinized faces either square this or deform it toward a T, as if sucking hard into a straw. Few men find that look beautiful, so you shouldn’t cultivate it intentionally.

You may wonder why I’ve declined to provide a more detailed analysis of advantageous facial traits. The wide variation in men's preferences isn't the only reason for this omission.

AI girls' faces are a good guide to the most conventionally attractive facial features.

It's often easy to see what distinguishes a bad face from a good face. But determining which factors differentiate an average face from an excellent face is another matter. The best faces aren't just better in two or three simple traits. They're slightly better in many small, interrelated dimensions. Nose shape, frequently targeted by surgeons, is only the most obvious. These many dimensions of facial beauty are hard to identify and measure, and eyeballing it based on rough rules of thumb simply isn’t enough.

AI can be useful, but it's important to resist the temptation to treat it like an oracle. It's not infallible, and because its knowledge ultimately derives from humans, it can repeat human errors and biases like the very ones dissected in this article. Attractive AI girls aren't created by AI alone, but with the careful intervention of human artists.

In the past women who wanted to improve their faces had to trust a cosmetic surgeon's professional opinion and hope for the best. But today we can also make use of AI.

"There is a true man of no rank always coming and going from the portals of your face. Who is that true man of no rank?"

Because AI can easily calculate a huge number of dimensions, it’s very useful for the analysis of faces. With this technology at our disposal, writing up a meticulous analysis of every facial feature would be a waste of effort. I'll elaborate further when I discuss cosmetic surgery in the second half of this article, where I'll also address noses in particular.

The most powerfully attractive expression contains a mixture of pleasure, painful longing, and fear, and is very far from a smile. It's sometimes referred to as a rictus of pleasure.
No, Smiles Are Not The Answer

Contrary to popular opinion, smiling isn't a reliable way to make faces more beautiful. Reexamine the faces in this section. Some are smiling, but many are not, and some are even scowling. Glamour models smile much less than half the time. Smiling is mainly important because it tells people you like them, not because it has beautifying effects. When men believe you like them, they tend to like you more in return. Frequent smiling is also useful for unattached women of mediocre beauty who want to be approached by timid men more often.

This isn't intended to imply that smiling is ugly or that you should avoid it. Some women really do have more charm when smiling. But it's not magic, and open-mouthed expressions like those below tend to be more attractive.

VIII. A note on masculine beauty

The truth about masculine beauty isn't obscure, and the lies are few in number. There's therefore no special need for an in-depth article on the topic. However, this section will provide useful context for our observations on feminine beauty. You can skip it if you'd like.

Scientific research suggests that height, upper body strength, and penis size are the main factors in masculine bodily attractiveness. This conclusion is corroborated by more reliable sources like stereotypes and the descriptions of attractive male bodies found in romance novels. Naturally a healthy weight is assumed to precede these three factors.

Most women also prefer men who are older than them. In romance novels a fifteen or twenty year age gap is typical. Some claim that only older romance authors write novels featuring such a big age gap, but that isn't the case. In surveys, on the other hand, women do report that they prefer a much smaller gap. While the optimal age gap may be unclear, it's important to recognize that most marriages today involve a difference of less than five years. Since older men typically desire younger women, they sometimes delude themselves on this point. It's unwise to assume you'll "age like wine." A few men do, but most don't.

Some older women impugn age gaps with sophistical, faux-moral objections intended to reduce competition from their juniors. These fit the pattern of "self-serving fallacies" identified earlier, and you needn't pay them any mind. Just choose the mate you consider best.

Men between 19 and 21 are at a distinct disadvantage, because while current laws and customs inhibit them from dating high-school students, they're still below the age preferred by recent female graduates. Be patient and persistent, and don't give in to discouragement. Your day will come.

Sex dolls marketed as “for women” typically have physiques that resemble those of the Korean actors above, and are less burly than romance-novel cover models. Stubble or facial hair is the norm, chest hair is common, and all have six- or eight-pack abs. Their median age looks to be late thirties, with lined faces and graying hair at times. Unfortunately women aren't the only buyers, so male sex dolls can't be considered reliable evidence.

A common beauty mistake men make is to imagine that raw muscle size is a cure-all. Precisely determining the optimum build is a difficult problem I don't intend to tackle here. If you're weaker than the men shown in this section, adding muscle should improve your attractiveness to the average woman. Even so, it's only one factor among many. Most romance cover models are considerably less bulky than top bodybuilders. And just as some men prefer less curvaceous women, some women prefer more modest muscles. Slim, fit men with other valuable traits can be successful.

The model pictured here was at one time so ubiquitous on the covers of romance novels that he became the butt of jokes. But he was popular for good reason. The written descriptions of the hero accurately match his appearance in this painting, and he remains an excellent example of masculine beauty.

Height is so simple that there's very little to say about it. But men do sometimes overlook the value of relative height. Short men will obviously have more success with short women. Tall men should also keep in mind that their natural advantage is multiplied where tall women are concerned, because these are reluctant to date men of average height. Since they're competing with a smaller pool of suitors, tall men can expect a higher success rate if they make it a priority to approach tall women.

Published research from highly ranked universities. If you trust peer-reviewed social science professors, you'll have exactly the knowledge you deserve.

Penis size is a particularly sensitive subject for many men. So in public women will often lie about the size they prefer, dodge the question, or at least understate their tastes. As usual, those with the most extreme tastes are the most likely to lie. Men should forgive them, because they tell the same lies for the same reasons when discussing breast size.

It would be hypocritical for men to blame shy size queens, and equally hypocritical for women to blame the male equivalent.

Below you can read a private discussion among women. I'm not presenting this as a typical conversation. It's an anecdotal example intended to shake the preconceptions of men who believe women are less demanding or judgmental than men in their physical preferences. In fact they can be quite brutal.

What penis size do women really prefer? I've gathered data using the same methodology I employed when researching breast size. You can see the results below.

Frequency of realistic dildo sizes at three specialty online retailers appearing on the first page of internet search results, as categorized by retailers. 2% small (3-5"), 28% medium (5-7"), 44% large (7-9"), 25% huge (9"+), n=834. The percentages given are averaged between the three retailers.

The taste isn't universal, but "large" is clearly the most popular size. For a more precise answer, I manually counted up all the realistic dildos at a single retailer. Previous studies of dildo size have arrived at lower numbers by including vibrators and unrealistic dildos in their sample, but that's a poor method for obvious reasons.

The average realistic dildo also measures 5.6" in circumference, 1.9 standard deviations above the global mean of 4.7" (Western mean 4.8"). From this data we can make the following observations:

  • Only 1% of women want less than five inches.
  • 80% of women want seven inches or more.
  • The average woman wants eight inches.
  • 33% of women want nine inches or more.
  • The average realistic dildo is 2.4" longer and double the volume of the average real penis.
If she hadn't dropped it, no one would have guessed.

We can't assume these dildo statistics transfer exactly to reality, of course. But we don't need to. The gap is so substantial that larger members will have an economic advantage even if dildo sizes overstate real preferences by a considerable margin. In practice, penis size is another case of bigger is better.

The best ad for lip fillers?

Some will argue that evidence derived from the sex toy business doesn't represent what women really want. Below you can see the results of an anonymous internet poll. Polls are unreliable, but this one gives remarkably similar answers to the research presented above. Romance novels, stereotypes, and even science tell the same basic story. And let's face it: the idea that women are buying toys they don't enjoy is pretty implausible.

With cosmetic surgery and good weight management, women can increase their breast size by four cups or more. Men, on the other hand, have essentially no ability to control their size. So why bother publishing this data? To put an end to hypocrisy, finger-pointing, and denialism about beauty, and show that men and women are more alike in their preferences than is commonly acknowledged. The battle of the sexes is a negative-sum game we shouldn't be playing. Put down your rhetorical weapons and try to build mutually fulfilling relationships instead.

Below I've made a composite of these two charts. We can easily see that there's a close analogy between women's penis size preferences and men's breast size preferences. For instance, an A-cup is equivalent to a four-inch penis, a B-cup is equivalent to a five-inch penis, and an H-cup is equivalent to a nine-inch penis. This "translation" may help you to understand and accept the tastes of the opposite sex.

The comparison reveals that both sexes prefer partners who are very far above the mean. That shouldn't be surprising at all. Why wouldn't they? But since humans are flawed and insecure, they rely on lies, complaints, and accusations to cover over uncomfortable truths, no matter how natural and obvious they might be. Women who feel hurt or offended by men's beauty preferences ought to stop and look in the mirror.

If you'd prefer a much larger member than your boyfriend has, would you tell him so? Probably not. Why, then, would you expect him to be honest with you about his own preferences?

A more remarkable conclusion we can draw from this data is that around a third of the people you'll meet today are attracted to extravagant sizes hardly ever found in reality. This applies to both genders. A number of women even want a penis size that's expected to occur in fewer than one out of a hundred billion men.

Some people have trouble accepting that preferences for scarce or impossible traits not only exist, but are normal. It seems to irk their moral sense even more than their pride. What they want is to live in a world where the real is already the ideal, or close to it. But not only is that not the case, it fundamentally can't be the case. I'll explain the reason for this later on.

Poorly endowed men shouldn't obsess over their size. There are many factors that influence attractiveness. A disadvantage in one trait won't prevent you from building a successful relationship. To put this in perspective, consider that a small penis and a flat chest are about equally popular with the opposite sex. But no one believes flat girls can't find love. You can find it too.

Be patient, dear female readers. Comforting words about love are scheduled for Section XI.

In practice, penis size is less important than breast size, because it doesn't affect your clothed appearance. Since advertising is the first and most important step for finding a mate, the practical utility of a trait you can't advertise is limited. Never let on that your size bothers you. Instead, project confidence and win her over with other traits. The ability to maintain an aura of strength despite your weaknesses is a key masculine virtue.

Confidence: Important For Men, But Not For Women

Most beauty advisors tell women that confidence will make them sexy. This amounts to a beauty lie. The sexes aren't symmetrical, and what's attractive in one isn't necessarily attractive in the other. Assuming otherwise is a common mistake today.

Uncertainty and fear are consistently unattractive in men, but neutral or even positive in women. Confidence may make it psychologically easier for women to carry themselves well and behave seductively, but it's the bearing and seductiveness that are attractive, not the confidence itself.
The circumcision room, Topkapi Palace.
A Note on Circumcision

Some women claim to prefer the appearance of a circumcised penis to an uncircumcised one. But the foreskin contains a significant fraction of the penile nerves responsible for sexual pleasure. It shouldn’t take more than a moment’s reflection to realize that removing it is quite insane, regardless of the visual outcome. For similar reasons, I advise women against cosmetic surgery on their genitals. Any purported aesthetic benefits are easily outweighed by the risks and drawbacks. I discuss the psychology behind the bizarre persistence of genital mutilation here.
In 2020 approximately 4% of women and 40% of men worldwide were victims of genital mutilation, usually executed in infancy and without their consent.

Male readers are hoping I'll conclude this section with tricks that will help them to catch women. I'd very much like to. However, the facts compel me to advise fatalism.

Of the three main factors in male bodily attractiveness, only muscular strength is under your control, and even that to a limited degree. Fashions are bland, and makeup is out of the question. There are some effective options for facial cosmetic surgery that I haven't time to discuss here. But overall, men's ability to improve the appearance they inherited is considerably less than women's.

Men looking for a magic solution to this limitation sometimes turn to pick-up artist “game” (a collection of psychological tricks for seducing women). I won't claim that game is false.

However, the effect size is limited, and those who peddle it are often guilty of overpromising. The next time you walk down a busy street, observe the couples. They have a similar level of purely physical attractiveness. If psychological tricks could really cancel out a poor appearance, this wouldn't be the case. The exceptions are so rare and noticeable that they prove the rule, and they typically involve large sums of money.

The heroes of romance novels are usually well off. However, using money to catch a better mate than you otherwise could is a dangerous tactic. It works best on women who want your money more than they want you, and some of them will only feign attraction until they take it.

I'll leave men with a short list of advice.

1. Maintain a healthy weight.
2. Develop your upper body strength.
3. Approach many women and don't take rejection to heart, because it's impossible to know in advance who will particularly like your face.
4. Don't allow your emotions to fixate entirely on one woman before she shows strong evidence of commitment and reliability.
5. Character does matter. Read romance novels to learn which traits women find attractive. These are not the same as the traits society praises as virtuous.
6. Once you've done the above, accept that the rest is up to fate. Believing you control things you don't is a recipe for unhappiness.

The third point in the list deserves special emphasis, because today many otherwise decent young men neglect it and suffer the consequences. When you approach women in your league, rejections will be more common than matches, and there's no way to avoid this with premeditation and calculation. To maximize your outcomes you must have the courage to repeatedly put your self-esteem at risk, and persist despite the inevitable demoralizing rejections. If you do not do this and instead aim to minimize rejections, you'll underperform your potential.

Not all fantasies are meant to be fulfilled.

As a side note, fantasies of dominance and violence are much more common among women than men. In fact, they don't even make the top fifteen list of men's fantasies. Women aren't aware of this gap, and those who project a lust for sexual violence onto men in order to enhance their own jouissance don't really want to be aware. Some women may expect you to engage in a theater of dominance that doesn't come naturally, and even detracts from your enjoyment. Whether you choose to indulge them is up to you.

This romance author sold 60 million novels on themes such as being captured and ravished by Viking warlords, being disenfranchised by seven-foot tall aliens who look like Fabio, and being enslaved and seduced in the exotic sands of the Orient. In her novels physical attraction is of primary importance, and love never precedes sex. While it's not clear she represents the majority taste, there's no denying that her work was popular with women.
Johanna Lindsey around the time she wrote the third passage quoted above.
Male and Female Sexual Psychology: Different but Complementary

Men's erotic sensibility focuses on the female form. Women's erotic sensibility, however, does not focus on the male form. Rather, it focuses on the pleasured female form as an object of desire.

That's why the erotica commonly preferred by women includes “forced seduction” (an enactment of desire), lesbian pornography (a spectacle of the pleasured female form), and even solo girls (female form as object of the desiring male gaze), but not male centerfolds. Male beauty is relevant because it affects the value of the desiring subject. Only to a lesser degree is it the object of erotic contemplation.

The vilification of the male gaze instigated by ugly girls actually does more harm to women than to men, because it gives women a psychological complex about being the object of desire when this is the primary source of their own enjoyment.

IX. "Beauty" and "hotness"

Some women make a fuss over a purported conflict between platonic “beauty” and visceral “hotness.” They're afraid too much sex appeal will make them less beautiful. They may even fear an overtly attractive body will harm their reputation, whether or not their behavior is virtuous. This is a mistake. It's best to have all the good things together.

Movies and television shows often typecast the most attractive women as bimbos, villains, or "mean girls" to contrast them with a more virtuous but less sexy heroine. This is a cheap literary device, not a reflection of reality.

For your inspiration, I asked men to send me images they consider both hot and beautiful. I've presented their submissions unfiltered and unedited in the galleries featured in this section.

Platonic beauty and hotness might be distinct. But they don't detract from each other. They complement and enhance each other. “Feminine beauty,” as I discuss it in the rest of this article, comprises both.

Public discussion tends to emphasize platonic beauty over sex appeal because it sounds more respectable. Consequently, an honest account like the one you're now reading will appear to do the reverse.

There are serious disadvantages to having a type of beauty that lacks sex appeal. You'll be put on a pedestal like an antique art object. Praised and even sought after, but not truly desired. You may even become a victim of infidelity. That's not a fulfilling state of affairs. It's in your own self-interest to pursue the full complement of feminine attractiveness.

It’s best to avoid men who have a Madonna-whore complex, because one woman will never fully satisfy them.

Other women may try to deter you. But you should be aware they're engaging in intrasexual competition. By convincing you to handicap yourself, they reduce the chance you could poach their mates or potential mates. By denigrating attractive traits, they confuse and demoralize the naturally gifted. Even your friends might do this unconsciously.

The illusion that beauty and hotness are in conflict is partly a result of social norms restricting the acknowledgement of genuine feminine sex appealeven at a time when sexualization seems ubiquitous. And it's partly a consequence of the statistical probabilities that govern the selection of models. A model chosen for erotically charged traits will likely be average in other traits, and therefore plainer than models selected purely for their facial beauty. The converse is also true. This might appear to imply a tradeoff or contradiction, but it doesn't. It's just chance.

Models chosen for a rare physique are likely to have average faces. This doesn't mean one causes the other.

This same principle applies to less tangible elements of aesthetics as well, such as a model's fashion sense, or the technical and artistic quality of her photographs.

The notion that there are always tradeoffs between good things is a lie we tell ourselves to support the flattering illusion that our faults are, in some larger sense, not faults at all. But aesthetics isn't a roleplaying game where each player gets a set number of points and distributes them, so that one point here means fewer points elsewhere. Nicer hair doesn't come at the cost of uglier toenails.

There's also no contradiction between hotness and intelligence.

This vintage centerfold (NSFW) is a striking example of beautiful eroticism. The model's extravagant chest does no harm to her prettiness, which is photographed in a style reminiscent of pre-Raphaelite painting. There's simply no meaningful aesthetic tradeoff for being hot.

There is, however, a meaningful social tradeoff for dressing in clothes that portray you as easily available. While they attract more men, they also deter the best long-term partners. Some women observe this and conclude that hotness itself deters the best partners, and it's better to be average than stunning, or even shun sex appeal altogether. But that's the wrong conclusion. Slutty fashions deter the best partners because they suggest you won't be faithful, not because hotness and beauty are fundamentally in conflict.

Hot, beautiful . . . and unreliable.

The photos men submitted for this section indeed show fashions that are hot and beautiful, but not all of them are appropriate for every context. When you're searching for a mate it's important to select styles that signal your fidelity and your broader value. This doesn't mean you need to dress conservatively, let alone intentionally make yourself plain. It's possible to look sexy without looking promiscuous, easy, or cheap. I'll offer more examples in the beauty tips at the end of this article.

Take some time to look closely at these galleries of images submitted by men. The makeup, clothes, lighting, and even scenery are aesthetically appealing. Each model has an individual character. Feminine sexual traits are indispensable, of course. But men have a finer and more holistic sensibility than you would assume if you judged their tastes on the basis of today's typically ugly pornography.

Don't let yourself be trapped in an aesthetic Madonna-whore complex. The distinction between platonic beauty and hotness is rarely useful, and best forgotten. Instead, embrace an undivided feminine beauty and enjoy together all the good things life has to offer.

Imaginary Women Revisited

Some argue imaginary women like those we analyzed earlier are misleading examples of beauty, because they're designed solely to stimulate lust. This claim doesn't survive scrutiny. It's unlikely anyone would have recourse to still images of clothed women for such a purpose when video pornography is readily available. Thus they provide useful examples of idealized women who are both hot and beautiful. Sometimes they're even presented as romantic partners. And their salient characteristics closely match those of other imaginary women made to appeal to men.

X. Correcting homework

I gave my female readers a simple homework assignment. I asked them to submit images they believed would receive the most positive votes when men were polled on how attractive they are. As we discussed earlier, popularity is different from value. However, it's still important to understand what most men like well enough that you can provide accurate examples.

Could you fill an empty harem to the sultan's satisfaction?

All the women who participated were familiar with this article. But a surprising thing happened. Almost none of them submitted images that match the ideals described in it. Naturally, their submissions received mediocre ratings from male voters. And we don't need to rely on survey results to know they fall short of the mark. Anyone who compares them to the beauty examples elsewhere in this article will see they don't match.

Image submitted by a female reader. Pretending that sexually unthreatening models are ideally beautiful is a subconscious defense mechanism. Poll results: 10% very attractive, 43% somewhat attractive, 47% not attractive. N=1,334.

There's only one possible explanation for such a strange outcome. Most women have a psychological block about acknowledging what men find attractive. They can read thousands of words and yet still choose the wrong answer.

One of the saddest facts about love is that mercenary women who are paid to understand what men like do so quickly and easily, whereas women who aren't invent all sorts of nonsense to avoid understanding, let alone pursuing it.

To help you overcome this psychological block, I'll go over submissions in detail and explain why they weren't successful. I'll need to be harshly critical, but keep in mind that the purpose is to instruct, not to be cruel for the sake of it.

Image submitted by a female reader. Poll result: 4% very attractive, 25% somewhat attractive, 71% not attractive. N=1,009. Too much upper-body muscle looks unfeminine.

Before you continue, find an image yourself. For this particular assignment, your task isn't to pick something to your own taste or your boyfriend's taste, but to correctly guess what the largest number of men will find attractive. After you've done your homework, continue reading to see if your answer was right.

Image submitted by a female reader. Poll result: 18% very attractive, 51% somewhat attractive, 31% not attractive. N=1,157.

Despite a pretty face and blonde hair, the submission above scored poorly. The faults here are many. First, the model's hair is short. Men prefer long hair, and indeed very long hair will perform best. Second, her chest is nearly flat. Men strongly dislike a flat chest. Her legs and butt are also quite thin. Some women feel irate that men don't appreciate this look as much as they believe they should. But the facts are the facts. It's simply not what men want.

Poll result: 15% very attractive, 47% somewhat attractive, 38% not attractive. N=1,261.

The next image also scored poorly. The model's clothing is obscuring the most important signals of attractiveness, namely her waist, breasts, and hips. This already ensures she won't register as attractive. Her hair is again too short. Her legs are again on the thin side, and looking at the photo one mainly has an impression of calf muscles. These have little effect on men, who are more attracted to thighs than calves, and typically not excited by muscles.

Poll results: 42% very attractive, 46% somewhat attractive, 12% not attractive. N=1,307.

This model is older than men consider optimal. That doesn't mean she's ugly, but it does mean she won't get a top score. Her breasts aren't especially small, but they're not big enough to be popular. Furthermore, her waist and hips aren't visible. Concealing them reduces attractiveness.

Poll result: 44% very attractive, 41% somewhat attractive, 15% not attractive. N=1,132.

The image above had a mediocre score for two main reasons. First, the model looks heavier in the belly than the average man today wants. Second, her very large rear is her most salient feature. Because men disagree about the best butt size, women with big butts underperform in polls. As explained previously, this doesn't mean big butts aren't attractive. They are. But due to the diversity of opinions, they don't win popularity contests. A medium-sized butt with a round shape is the most broadly popular, because everyone likes it reasonably well.

Poll results: 49% very attractive, 44% somewhat attractive, 7% not attractive. N=1,153.

This image had a good but not fantastic score. The model lost points because her hair is too short, her chest is too small, her waist isn't clearly visible, and her legs are unremarkable. But her expression is a little more charming than the previous models, and blonde hair seems to add a few extra points, as some men strongly prefer it.

Poll results: 59% very attractive, 35% somewhat attractive, 6% not attractive. N=1,113.

The model above received a good but not fantastic rating. Her appeal is limited primarily because she doesn't have a true hourglass figure. Her waist should be smaller relative to her ribcage, and her breasts should be larger. Extra-large breasts receive both higher positive and lower negative ratings than medium-sized breasts like these. That's because a significant fraction of the men who appear to prefer small breasts are actually just indifferent to size. Faces are subjective, but hers is perhaps not in the first rank. Last but by no means least, tattoos reduce attractiveness.

Poll results: 69% very attractive, 28% somewhat attractive, 4% not attractive. N=1,304.

This is the most popular model initially submitted by female readers. She has a better figure than any of the previous models and predictably performed well. Her thicker thighs contribute to her appeal. So do her youthfulness and playfully seductive expression and posture. With a prettier face and more pronounced hourglass, she would have performed even better.

Poll results: 83% very attractive, 14% somewhat attractive, 3% not attractive. N=637.

The next images weren't submitted by women. Instead they're examples of the kind of images that receive high ratings from men.

Poll results: 82% very attractive, 17% somewhat attractive, 1% not attractive. N=1,004.

To get past a psychological block and understand feminine beauty, you need to accept that the typical man's preferences really are exactly as this article has described them. The top-scoring images look extremely similar. This is not an accident. There's a generic look that consistently wins popularity contests, and this is it.

Poll results: 83% very attractive, 13% somewhat attractive, 4% not attractive. N=1,377. Note that she does not have a thigh gap.

Before you continue reading, compare the next two images. Try to guess the rating of the left image, and explain why men might not like it as much as the right image. Then check your answer below.

Many women consider the figure at left ideal. In public everyone will tell her she's perfect and shouldn't change anything. And men will agree, because if they tell the truth in mixed company they'll seem vulgar and impolite, and make women angry. But while the model at left is pretty, she's just not very exciting. She's too thin and her chest is barely a B-cup. Her butt has a good shape, but less volume than the median male prefers, and one can't see her hips. Her thighs lack volume too. Left is what people say is perfect, but right is what most men actually want.

To reiterate, men want a young woman with a small waist, wide hips, large breasts (much larger than you think), a rounded rear with good projection (for maximum popularity, neither too small nor too large), a pretty face, makeup (not overdone), long hair (about waist length), and properly fitted clothing.

Are you starting to recognize the pattern?

Any woman who covers all these points will receive a warm response from eighty to ninety percent of men even if other details aren't perfect. The models female readers initially submitted failed to do so.

Poll results: 86% very attractive, 12% somewhat attractive, 3% not attractive. N=805.
Photography Matters

Photographic details influence men's perceptions. The camera angle in the photo above was cleverly chosen to conceal the faults of a model who's markedly less attractive in reality. Photos are inherently distorted because they reduce three dimensions to two. A casual snap won't represent your face accurately, and will typically make you look uglier than reality. It's important to learn how to take selfies that are flattering but not deceptive. If you haven't done this yet, guides are easily found on the internet. The most critical elements aren't your pose or expression, but camera distance and lighting angles.
Image submitted by a female reader after practice. Poll results: 78% very attractive, 20% somewhat attractive, 2% not attractive. N=810.

However, when women were coached and allowed them to repeatedly submit new images for ratings, some of them quickly learned how to select models just as popular as those chosen by men.

Image submitted by a female reader after practice. Poll results: 75% very attractive, 21% somewhat attractive, 4% not attractive. N=1,222.

After this coaching I arranged a contest where a girls' team competed with a boys' team to choose the most highly rated images. Remarkably, the girls' team won. The image above was one of their winning choices. This proves it's entirely possible to overcome a psychological block and understand men's tastes if you're willing to make the effort.

Image submitted by a female reader after practice. Poll results: 78% very attractive, 16% somewhat attractive, 6% not attractive. N=1,039. A classically attractive bodyfat level. This image would have scored higher if it were less blurry.

To confirm your understanding, do another little homework assignment. Ignore your intuitions entirely. Instead, force yourself to search for one image that fits exactly the description of a generically attractive woman given a few paragraphs above. You may have to overcome an innate aversion, but you can succeed if you try.

Image submitted by a female reader after practice. Poll results: 80% very attractive, 17% somewhat attractive, 3% not attractive. N=994.

Naturally this is only an exercise. Popularity isn't the same as value. So after you've learned how to satisfy the crowd, broaden your view by finding images that fulfill the minority tastes discussed elsewhere in this article. Don't assume you understand what you've read here until you've finished all your homework.

Refuses to do her homework.
Polls provided a convenient way to "grade" this homework assignment. However, you should never put much trust in them. The other sources presented in this article remain the most reliable benchmarks of feminine beauty.

XI. Drawing the right conclusions

It's unfortunately common for women who read this article to draw the wrong conclusions from it. Realizing they'll never attain the ideal form desired by men, they react by rejecting the ideal, rejecting men, or even rejecting themselves. Women are sensitive to any criticism of their appearance, so this emotional reaction is understandable. But it's also very foolish.

Imperfection is part of being human, not a reason to hate yourself. If you always get a perfect score, this only means you're being given tests that are too easy.

This woman does not exist.

A beauty ideal actually needs to be unattainable. If it were attainable, it wouldn't be useful for discriminating between the best potential mates, since all of them would have attained it. That's why a gap between the ideal and the real is fundamental to our sense of sexual aesthetics, and not something that can be argued away. At times this manifests itself as a taste for unreachable extremes, the simplest of which we've examined above.

Nobody looks like this.

So not only is there no shame in falling short of the ideal, it's actually expected that everyone will fall short in one way or another. This isn't your fault nor men's.

In the present day there's a strong push to deal with human shortcomings by lowering or eliminating ideals and standards. All sorts of sophistical arguments are put forth to accomplish the destruction. This race to the bottom isn't motivated only by the resentment of the least successful. It's also happening because our society has, by and large, forgotten grace. High ideals are more psychologically sustainable when they're accompanied by forgiveness for humans who fail to meet them.

A gap between the ideal and the real is a condition of possibility for our aspirations to make the world a better place. So if the truth about beauty is difficult for you to accept, don't join the mob set on erasing ideals. Don't listen to dishonest flattery you'll never really believe. Instead of lies, seek grace. And remember that love neither requires nor expects perfection.

What's the right way to use the information you've just learned? By understanding the truth about feminine beauty, you can target your efforts to improve your appearance more accurately and stop wasting energy running in the wrong direction. The truth won't ensure you reach the ideal, but it will help you to get the most out of your innate potential. That's the topic of the next section.

"Sorry I don't have a coat on! I left my phone in my car and I'm just running over to my detached garage to get it."
How To Break It To Her

If you’re male and you’d like to share this article with a female relative or acquaintance in a non-confrontational way, just tell her, “This article gives a pretty accurate description of what most guys like.” Don't be pushy. If you’re in a relationship and trying to fix a dead bedroom, you’ll probably need to be more forthright about your own tastes. However, be aware that many women simply cannot accept the truth about feminine beauty, and will react with anger and dismissal regardless of how you present it.

As a final recap, I'll draw your attention again to the two images previously identified as representing the median sex doll and median AI girl respectively. This gallery serves as a concise summary of our conclusions.

XII. Reality-based beauty tips

Here are a few simple, reality-based beauty tips. Many of them will be familiar. But since you now know the truth about feminine beauty, you can reconsider them with a fresh perspective. The basics of beautification aren’t magic. This advice will work for anyone, including you. And in the final account, the accuracy of this article will be proven by men's reaction to those who apply it. (Male readers may want to skip this section and hold on to their illusions.)

While women derive erotic satisfaction from feeling attractive, most waste their energy chasing a look that isn't. Why not set yourself up for pleasure instead?

Don’t be discouraged because the ideal body of a love goddess is out of reach. Modest improvements still help. Giving up on the game of beauty because you can’t win first place is a mistake. In fact, average-looking girls benefit more from improving their appearance than naturally gifted women do.

Never let jealousy of other women stop you from achieving your personal best.

It’s also a mistake to rely entirely on your personality and intelligence to sell you as a mate. This is like trying to win a triathlon without learning how to swim. Instead, use your intelligence to improve your appearance. If you follow all the advice below, you might gain three points on the beauty scale. That's the difference between a six and a nine.

You can’t win by brains alone.

More and more women are trapped in a game mass marketing has created for them, and men only have a token role in it. Indeed, women today have been trained to value the tastes of celebrity spokesmodels above those of their lovers. So they spend time and money on fashion with little to show for it, competing with each other to chase arbitrary targets for no discernable reward. This trend is encouraged by businesses, who exploit rhetoric about "independence" to replace love with dependency on consumerism.

Most women are too prideful to admit they've been fooled and change direction. But their loss can be your gain. There's plenty of room to increase your romantic success and strengthen your relationships if you ignore the chorus of lies and make an effort to apply your new understanding.

Feminine beauty is easily hackable.

The stakes are higher now than ever. Today men are increasingly seduced by egirls who hook them with a combination of personal charm, virtual stripteases, and powerful AI effects. While real women have been wasting their time reading Vogue, shopping for handbags, and copying Hollywood actresses, these online strippers have weaponized the truth about feminine beauty. And that's not all. Tech startups designing AI girlfriends have studied this very article to optimize their models.

They'll use every trick in the book to hack men's brains and lock them in a world of virtual sex and imaginary relationships. As I explain in my essay on ultrahumanism, even desirable men are increasingly vulnerable. So please don't hold back. Apply the advice below, and beat them at their own game. You'll do us all good.

This AI-optimized siren is doing everything she can to steal your man's heart. Will you fight back and save the world?

1. Finding the best weight for you.
2. Clothing and fashion.
3. Cosmetics and cosmetic surgery.
4. Hair, skin, and eyes.
5. Motion and posture.
6. The most common misconception about seduction.
7. Personality and individuality.
8. Beauty and aging.
9. The top seven ways to look more attractive.

Note: The author does not sell beauty advice, beauty products, or beauty services of any kind.

1. Finding the best weight for you.

The classic feminine figure has a moderate and healthy weight. This model closely matches the generic sex doll torso.

Excess weight harms your appearance and your health. In fact, weight is the single most important element of beauty under your control. But that doesn’t mean anorexia or obsessive dieting are advantageous.

This model is already slim, and losing weight would definitely harm her figure. You should never strive to eliminate all fat from your body.

The examples in this article show that a healthy, slim weight is best, but not less. Minimizing bodyfat by undereating won't maximize attractiveness. In fact, it will actually make you less attractive.

Trolls tell attractive women they're overweight just for the joy of causing pain. You need to learn to ignore them and focus on the facts. When men can choose any bodyfat level they want, as in an erotic drawing, they don't choose a skeletal figure. The image below was the most popular drawing of the day on an anime image site.

One of the most instructive examples of male taste. Well, apart from the ears.

In erotic drawings and AI-generated images, girls without curves are always depicted as juvenile, never tall and narrow in the manner of fashion models.

When it comes to waist size, smaller is better. But when it comes to feminine curves, bigger is better. Because these goals conflict, you need to aim for a weight that compromises between the two. Simply dieting to chase the smallest waist size is counterproductive, because it fails badly at the second goal.

It's the combination of small waist and feminine curves that make a figure like this so attractive. Not one of them in isolation.

Losing too much weight shrinks your bust, hips, thighs, and rear more than your waist and arms, and the overall effect becomes negative. The tradeoff isn't worth it.

Thick thighs are attractive in combination with a small waist.

You should avoid losing too much weight even if you have breast implants, because extremely low bodyfat will typically make them look more artificial.

While attractive as is, this model would look more natural and blended with a higher bodyfat level.

The optimal weight for attractiveness depends on your personal bodyfat distribution, not an arbitrary number we can predetermine. The better your bodyfat distribution, the more you benefit from a few extra pounds. To point you in the right direction I'll go over a series of examples, starting with the thinnest.

The top fashion model below looks both too thin and too masculine, with no feminine softness at all. A visibly muscular abdomen is unattractive to most men. This is certainly not the best weight for her body. Even if you don't carry weight well, you shouldn't copy her fashionable physique.

Not advisable regardless of your body type.

If you have a poor bodyfat distribution (i.e. fat always goes to your belly instead of your hips, chest, rear, or thighs), staying rather thin is indeed the best choice. But don't overdo it. Men who prefer thin women still dislike skeletons. The photo below shows a slim but healthy and attractive figure. Don't aim to be thinner than this.

Don't go below this weight regardless of your body type.

Here's another example of a model with an unspectacular bodyfat distribution. Losing more weight would be risky, because it might eliminate the minimal curves she does have. For example, the difference between a small B-cup and a totally flat chest is very important to men. So if you can avoid a flat chest through weight management, you should.

Perhaps the optimal weight for this model.

You might feel intimidated by the curvaceous models in this article because you don't have the genetics or surgical budget to imitate their figures effectively. However, as the example above shows, nearly all women have some attractive curves when they optimize their weight. Regardless of whether yours are modest or spectacular, dieting them away is a mistake.

This imaginary woman is thinner and flatter than the norm. However, she isn't skeletal, and some attractive bodyfat is clearly on display.

The next gallery shows a reasonable weight target for an average woman with an average bodyfat distribution. And here you can see a more relatable fine arts model with no cosmetic surgery and poor lighting, juxtaposed with an anime girl for reference. Her physique is also a good target for average women. Most women assume she should lose a few pounds, but that would clearly reduce her resemblance to the anime girl, and likely her overall attractiveness as well.

The AI-generated image below is an excellent example of a weight women fear is too much, but men find extremely attractive on the right person. For someone with this bodyfat distribution, a lower weight would reduce sex appeal.

A perfect weight for this particular figure.

The photo below is also instructive. This model has more belly fat than men typically want today. Yet because her chest is much larger than her waist, the net result is attractive even if it's not perfect. The average woman would look relatively plain with the same amount of bodyfat, and should aim to be leaner.

Not advised for most women, but reasonable for this particular model.

A naturally attractive butt is a common casualty of excessive weight loss. If you tend to hold weight in your rear, remember that bigger is better, and don't squander your lucky genetics by dieting your butt away. This AI girl would be less attractive at a lower weight.

The bottom-heavy glamour model shown below has an excellent weight for her body type. There's no doubt that losing weight would make her less attractive.

How much is too much? The models in the next gallery, and others like them, were sent to me by men as examples of perfect butts. If your butt is expanding much faster than your waist, the extra weight is likely increasing your attractiveness even though your rear is already large. To check your fat distribution, compare your own photo to the examples.

The next AI girl illustrates the upper range of male taste. This weight only works for rare women with an unusually good bodyfat distribution. Provided that criterion is met, the majority of men will find it attractive, although most won't consider it ideal, and a significant minority will reject it outright. In any case you should never exceed this weight.

Don't exceed this weight regardless of your body type.

Finally, the AI girl below has a classical figure that's neither too thick nor too thin, and exemplifies beauty, class, and sex appeal at the same time. It's an excellent goal for women who have the body type to pull it off, but not everyone can. Know your limits and find the best weight for you.

An ideal goal, but only for those who can achieve it.

Beauty lies aren't a victimless crime. Some women damage their health and happiness by obsessively seeking thinness. They congregate on social media and reinforce their delusions, making their mental illness harder to escape.

If you're “pro-anorexia,” it's time to reconsider your views. This article is the most honest and accurate analysis of feminine beauty you're going to find. You should take the data it presents seriously. Slimming down at the expense of beauty and health doesn't make sense, even if it impresses other girls who are making the same mistake. Stop hurting yourself and change direction.

In case it wasn't already evident, I'll point out explicitly that thigh gaps are not a useful target for determining your ideal weight. Nor are they an important element of attractiveness in themselves.

This sex doll exhibits an excellent rear shape with no thigh gap.

An ancestral diet and moderate exercise are enough for most women to maintain a healthy weight. Further specifics about diet are uncertain and likely vary from person to person. Some people seem to benefit from eating more protein and less fat (more lean meats), but others do best eating more fat and less protein (more fatty meats and oils). Some people have a high tolerance for carbs, others low. Some even thrive on a purely carnivorous diet.

Carb tolerance varies.

To find out what works for you, you’ll have to experiment over a long period of time. Eliminating carbs and seed oils entirely for a few months and then gradually adding them back to your diet is a popular technique for finding the right balance. If you need to lose a lot of weight but you’re not sure where to start, you might want to try this first.

An early example of AI-generated erotic art. With a good fat distribution you can look attractive at a rather high bodyfat level.

If you struggle with anorexia or body dysmorphia, it's important that you consume regular meals with a good balance of nutrients. Fasting or skipping meals can exacerbate psychological issues and even suppress your appetite, creating a vicious cycle of anxiety and undereating. Eat regularly even if you aren't hungry, and when you find yourself stuck in a mental loop, focus your mind on a distracting activity until it passes. Save the beauty examples from this article and remind yourself that you'll be unattractive if you're too thin.

This type of attractive rear is never the product of exercise.

Exercise is less important to maintain a healthy weight than diet, but still worth some effort. A brief but intense strength-training workout once a week should be sufficient. And while trainers won't approve, as far as beauty is concerned it might be best to skip upper-body exercise entirely and compensate with extra lower-body work. Abs don't contribute to feminine beauty, broad shoulders are more negative than positive, and idealized imaginary women usually have thin and undeveloped arms regardless of how thick their bodies are.

More frequent strength training focused on the glutes is advisable for women with a flat rear, but there are limits to what it can accomplish. Models with a large rear may credit it to exercise, but genetics, good weight management, and surgery are the main causes.

2. Clothing and fashion.

Men don't have X-ray vision, so beautiful women in ill-fitted clothes can actually pass unnoticed for years, which is a very sad thing. The best men should be able to think past your clothes, but the truth is most are dumb and only notice what's on display.

Most of the examples in this article are chosen to display attractive bodies, not good clothing choices. 

Because men have such a strong preference for a small waist, you should always wear clothes that are fitted at the waist, not loose. This is especially true for women with a "monarchiste" body type. These clothes can be hard to find today, when most of the population is overweight.

Monarchistes like this one need to take special care in their clothing selection. Their body type is the most difficult to dress in modern clothes, and also suffers the most from poor fit and bad posture, which can conceal their natural advantages and cause them to look dumpy.

Stretch fabrics or elastic bands are an easy shortcut solution, but sometimes a tailor is necessary. Don't skimp. It's well worth the money to have everything altered to match your personal measurements. In fact, wearing clothes off the rack without having them tailored is the most common reason curvaceous women fail to benefit from their gifts.

There are a few exceptions to the rule: very straight and thin women can do well with flowing clothes, and top-heavy women with a relatively thick middle may look best in an empire waist.

Flared skirts with a fitted waist can help women who have narrow hips create the impression of an hourglass figure.

If you’re socially anxious and wear baggy or poorly fitted clothes to hide your body even though you have a healthy weight, please stop. There are better ways to be modest. Wear snug but high-necked shirts, and long skirts that are tightly fitted at the waist. These look modest but still allow people to notice that you have an attractive figure.

Well-fitted clothes can be modest without looking sloppy.

Of course, all things being equal, it’s best to dress to an average degree of modesty in the area where you live, with modifications based on the occasion. You’ll normally have the most success with good men if your clothing is neither particularly modest nor particularly immodest. That said, all things aren't necessarily equal. The sexier you are, the more careful your clothing choices should be.

A 19th-century state of undress.

It's obvious that sex appeal alone isn't enough to catch a high-quality man. It's also important to display trustworthiness and class.

Most women want to present themselves as desirable mates for high-quality men and avoid inviting attention from low-quality men. Today they typically solve this problem in ways that reduce their overall attractiveness. For instance, maintaining an excessively low bodyweight, and wearing fashionable but unappealing clothing.

This is a poor solution, and it's not the one women chose historically. It may signal class and deter undesirable men seeking quick sex. But in the same blow it reduces your attractiveness to the men you really do want, and reduces the amount of beauty in the world too.

In past times women signaled class with refined manners and elegant clothing that enhanced rather than reduced their feminine beauty. This clothing was designed to emphasize a curvaceous figure without inviting the wrong kind of attention. So while women's default solution today requires a costly tradeoff, their historical solution did not.

Naturally you don't have the power to bring old dresses into style. But that doesn't mean you can't use the historical solution today. By selecting the right clothing instead of flattening your curves, you can deter undesirable men while retaining all of your sex appeal when you undress. You don't need to make yourself plain to filter your suitors.

Good and Bad Ways to Signal Class

Recommending fine manners may seem off topic here. Yet if one has a choice between signaling class by looking less attractive, or signaling class by speaking politely, behaving with refinement, and dressing well, it's obvious which is the better option.
A wealthy heiress with a pure character, modest clothing, and large breast implants. Male dreams, courtesy of AI artists.

It's not possible to give instructions for finding the "right" style that are both precise and universally valid, because standards vary too much from place to place. Below I'll offer a few more general suggestions. But in the end you'll have to rely on your own judgment.

Some traditional, aristocratic dresses are quite low cut. Decolletage isn't fundamentally trashy. However, with today's less ornate styles a good starting guideline is to assume that the more cleavage you can show, the less you should show. Compensate with a proper fit that displays your silhouette, and avoid resorting to baggy clothes.

To be clear, these are only suggestions. Appropriate fashion always depends on the context, and I can't know yours. If women around you have plunging necklines or see-through tops, it may be best to compete in kind. Consider your personal goals and use your intelligence and sensitivity to position yourself effectively.

Ultra-Busty Bikini Problems

Bikinis for huge-breasted women usually look either too matronly or too skimpy. This is partly an issue of availability, and partly a matter of different clothes suiting different body types. The difficulty of finding bikinis and bras is not evidence that your chest is too large. Popular huge-breasted glamour models who look excellent topless nevertheless tend to avoid posing in bikinis, and even bras. When they want to dress down, they substitute tank tops or t-shirts cropped or tied above the navel. Whether or not you can find the perfect bikini, you may shine more in these alternative styles.

Wearing provocative clothes in private while dressing conservatively in public is a way to reduce tradeoffs with minimal effort.

A peacock doesn't keep his tail open all the time.

Beyond the obvious tactic of showing more skin, provocative fashions that may increase sex appeal for a private or bacchanal setting include lace lingerie, pleated plaid “schoolgirl” miniskirts, chokers, and thigh-high stockings. Even in private, showing everything all the time is less exciting than concealing something that demands to be revealed.

Below are images of the same three glamour models in different outfits. As you can see, it's easy to tone it down or turn it up to suit the context.

Because men like variety, periodically changing your style may also make it easier to retain or reawaken your mate's attention. That includes both short-term variation between conservative and provocative clothing and occasional long-term shifts in your wardrobe. Note, however, that this has little to do with following current fashion trends.

Contrary to what most beauty magazines, sites, and influencers claim or imply, up-to-the-minute clothing styles aren’t important. The fashion industry makes money by persuading you that you’ll be more beautiful if you buy the newest clothes, but this simply isn’t true.

These clothes are more than fifty years old and still look excellent.

While it would be odd to go out in your grandmother’s dress, it doesn’t really matter whether you wear this year’s fashions or last year’s. So there's no need to waste time chasing fads.

Men are typically less enthusiastic about formal dresses and unusual fashions than women are. What matters most to them are the fundamentals. If you have a poor fashion sense or little interest, don't worry. Provided you follow the basic guidelines explained in this section, it's perfectly acceptable to wear "normal" clothes and leave it at that. Fit is more important than fashion.

Given the extensive criticism in this article, you might assume the author has a bias against fashion. To the contrary. Pretty clothes are aesthetically valuable and I encourage you to participate if you enjoy them. It remains true that few men care as much as you might hope, and high fashion in particular has gone down a harmful path.

3. Cosmetics and cosmetic surgery.

Cosmetic surgery is more common than you might assume. Once again, everyone lies. Women who’ve had work done normally deny it. Men are ignorant on the topic. They criticize artificiality, then ogle surgically-enhanced models. Men claim to care about “naturalness,” but in practice they’d rather see good results. Watch what people do, not what they say.

Unnaturally attractive.

Most men prefer a breast size that’s rarely found in nature. In fact, it’s almost impossible to resemble some of the beauty examples in this article through natural means. One in twenty-five women now have implants, a number that’s increased steadily over time, and they’re especially common among glamour models who appeal to men. Today it's likely that the majority of slim women with large breasts have had surgical help.

Men are clueless about what's really natural. This model is surgically enhanced and wearing heavy makeup, but still creates a "natural" impression.

Why are so many people convinced that cosmetic surgery doesn't work? The worst results are obvious, while the best don't appear surgical at all. Because they stand out the most, people mistakenly assume the worst results are typical. I call this the "gaudy graveyard" fallacy.

The effort men spend doing chest exercises in the weight room (week after week, year after year) is much greater than the effort required to have your breasts done. The cumulative cost of gym membership fees is often higher too.

I won’t advise you for or against surgery. Weighing the risks is a personal matter. Your health and happiness should come first, and it's up to you to decide how much effort this type of beautification is worth. But the truth is, it usually works.

Men aren't looking at her earlobes and don't wish she had muscles. Really.

Just how well does it work? The academic psychology study below might lead you to believe that breast augmentation is less effective at increasing your attractiveness than waxing, tooth whitening, ear piercing, nail painting, and even building your muscles. This is comically wrong.

While you'll rarely hear anyone admit it, a good boob job is the single most powerful way for a slim woman to increase her sex appeal. (N.B. all linked images in this section are unclothed.) The reason is simple. Men strongly prefer big boobs, and a breast augmentation buys them. Painted nails aren't remotely comparable in importance, and weight loss becomes counterproductive when taken too far.

Well-executed breast augmentations are difficult to distinguish from the real thing. Many of the top search results for “best breasts” are augmented, and some have an openly artificial appearance. For comparison, these vintage centerfolds are excellent reference examples of the best natural breasts.

Breast augmentation example from a surgeon's website.

Men instinctively lie about beauty in general, and about cosmetic surgery in particular. So to learn what they really think about implants I had to resort to deception. I reversed the before and after photos of a breast augmentation and told them it was a reduction. Then I asked which they preferred.

Men chose the augmented breasts over the natural ones by a shocking ratio of more than thirty to one. Many described the big fakes as "perfect" and made demeaning comments about the flat photo. It's true that you can't trust polls to be accurate. But this result is stark and thought-provoking. It also fits our earlier finding that only 2-3% of men prefer a flat chest.

I'm not sure if this set is fake, and neither are you.

Articles about breast augmentation usually ignore the reality that male preferences extend far above the popular implant size of 400cc. Men's median breast size preference seems roughly equivalent to 800cc. And some men prefer twice that or more. This shouldn't come as a surprise. Women can be even more demanding and judgmental about size than men are.

Seductive spirits from a Buddhist sculpture, circa 200AD.

Since rarity increases with size, it would be advantageous to exceed the median preference to meet the unsatisfied demand. But even setting aside practical concerns, "bigger is better" only holds as long as you can maintain a good shape. 800cc is the upper limit for reliable surgical results, and for most women it's simply not worth it to push the limit.

A good surgeon can augment the average woman to this size without introducing distortions.

The effect of each implant size depends on your starting point as well as your overall body shape, but here you can see common surgical outcomes compared to examples from this article. Contrary to what most people assume, small implants aren’t more convincing than large ones. However, extreme, oversized implants have a distorted shape and should be avoided.

Implants can't reach the size of this clothing-store mannequin without sacrificing shape. Even professional models willing to risk multiple surgeries should limit themselves to 800cc implants.

In some parts of the world obvious plastic surgery has become a status symbol. But whenever status signaling interferes with feminine beauty, the result is less feminine beauty. It doesn't matter if it's excessively low bodyfat or flagrantly fake implants.

Because only a small amount of fat can be transferred at once, fat transfer is more effective as a supplement than as a substitute for implants. Consult your surgeon for details.

This article promotes a naturalistic or too-good-to-be-true look, not an overdone look. Cosmetic surgery shouldn't announce itself as such. While a few men do fetishize the appearance of excessive surgery and blatantly fake breasts, a much larger number find it distasteful. The difference lies not in the size itself, as women tend to assume, but in the quality of the shape.

How Fake Is Too Fake?

The augmentation above is too spherical and too clearly outlined to look perfect. However, it's not flagrantly fake either. In such borderline cases men's taste for size overwhelms their concerns about subtle flaws. 79% rated the photo "very attractive," 18% rated it "somewhat attractive," and only the familiar 3% rated it "not attractive" (n=1,691). That's an extremely high score.

You can compare the pre-op photo below. 49% rated it "very attractive," 45% "somewhat attractive," and 6% "not attractive" (n=1,016). So while you should aim for perfect shape, quantity does have a quality of its own. An augmentation doesn't need to be perfect to be effective.

For a guide to shape, refer to this image. The top row shows photos selected by men as examples of perfect shape. Note that some (or all) of these are augmented. The bottom row shows the shape of breasts on sex dolls. The third sex doll has a combination of size and shape that's impossible in reality.

This survey compares the popularity of various shapes and sizes. An experienced surgeon has estimated the winner at the upper left to be approximately 1000ccs. All but the tiny fraction of men who prefer a flat chest rated it positively.

A good set of implants can even help to distract from other beauty errors, like short hair.

As you can see, men prefer a little sag. A high and spherical look isn't a sign of perfection, it's the hallmark of a poor boob job. Upward-pointing nipples are thought to be advantageous, and can be found on some, but not all, of men's favorite breasts.

Before the development of breast augmentation this was a one-in-a-million figure. Today you can buy it.
How Much Sagging Is Too Much?

If your breasts don’t match the most desired shape, don’t panic. To determine whether they're sagging too much, consult this compilation of images submitted by men as examples of their favorite shape. While the majority are perky, a few, like the image at the upper right, show considerable sag. A surgical lift isn’t worth the trouble until your breasts fall outside this range.

Men's tolerance for sagging increases with size, meaning it's more acceptable on larger breasts than smaller ones. When small breasts sag, the result is poor.
You can achieve especially striking results by augmenting breasts that are naturally large. This trick is frequently used by glamour models.

If your goal is to be as attractive as possible without undue risk, I recommend you find a trustworthy plastic surgeon and request the largest size that can be achieved safely in a single surgery—usually around 600cc, though it varies from person to person depending on your ribcage measurements. This size looks impressive without sacrificing shape.

The expected augmentation outcome when a woman of average natural measurements follows the guidelines provided in this article.

Narrow hips aren't a good reason to limit yourself to small implants, because the effects of breasts and butts are mainly independent and additive. In other words, 1+1 > 1+0 > 0+0. "Balance" might sound respectable in conversation, but it has relatively little effect on your attractiveness in itself.

While few admit to preferring extremely top-heavy figures in mixed company, they're still rare and in demand, and some men specifically seek them out.

You may be tempted to select smaller implants because you're afraid of excessive attention from men or retaliation from jealous friends. When choosing a size you should consider your personal comfort level, just as you do when choosing clothes. But keep in mind that 300cc implants entail nearly the same costs and risks as 600cc implants, while providing only half the benefits.

Some post-op polls suggest a large majority of women underestimate the size they really want.

As far as beauty is concerned, augmentations below 500cc are a missed opportunity. Conservative tops will give you the option to tone your chest down as needed, but an underwhelming boob job will always be underwhelming when it matters most. (N.B. This rough number isn't intended to imply you should exceed the safe limits recommended by your doctor after an examination, which may be lower for some petite women.)

Don't rely on cup letters when selecting your size. Cup letters can be misleading, and the bra sizes cited by surgeons are often smaller than those buxom women report to fit comfortably.

It's aesthetic medicine, not magic.

The two examples below illustrate the range of well-shaped breast-augmentation results. The model on the right started with a C-cup and is using a flattering camera angle, so most won't reach her apparent size even with implants.

To be clear, these guidelines only apply to implant selection for women of unexceptional natural size. If you're naturally bigger, that's not a weakness in need of surgical correction.

In the gallery below you'll find photos of a breast reduction. Even starting from an exceptional size well above the median preference, men did not consider it an improvement. While several confounding factors may have biased this poll, none are as important as the supply-demand advantage that greatly favors her pre-op appearance. It was so rare that a 1% share of men's vote would already have been enough to make it valuable, let alone 58%. All things considered, we can be confident that reducing her breasts also reduced her attractiveness by a considerable margin.

Breast Reduction: Don't Do It

Don't let ideology and lies from the media drive you to make poor personal choices. A breast reduction is a terrible idea unless you're suffering real health problems that can't be corrected in any other way. Ignore what jealous women might tell you, and remember that there's no aesthetic upper limit to natural breast size. If you know someone who's contemplating a reduction, send her here.
When it comes to praising buxom girls, men are either awkward or reticent, because they're afraid of being attacked. Don't take it to heart. This model has millions of fans, and a reduction would be criminal.

Because large breasts are more popular than large rears in most of the world, butt augmentation will provide a lower return on investment than breast augmentation for the majority of readers. Unless you're a professional model, wealthy, or seeking men from a region known to prioritize butts, the benefit is unlikely to justify the expense.

A big butt is a valuable trait, but not necessarily worth obtaining surgically.
Boobs vs Butts: Intergroup Differences

The importance men assign to breasts versus butts varies more from group to group than any other major element of feminine beauty. Butts are relatively more important to men in South America, the Middle East, and especially Africa, while breasts are relatively more important to men in Europe and Asia. For instance, in a large database of East Asian erotic drawings, images of breasts occur far more often than images of butts. North America is heterogeneous and falls between these groups, yet a major American sex-doll retailer still carries about twice as many dolls with big breasts as big butts, implying breast size is more valuable there overall.

Despite these differences, it's a mistake to assume butts are only appreciated in certain places, or that the taste for them elsewhere is purely a product of media pressure. That's not the case. And different priorities aren't necessarily the same as different ideals. Men who primarily care about breasts still find shapely rears attractive, and may even prefer large ones.
The ideal butt shape looks approximately like this, but size preferences vary widely.

If you decide to have a butt lift, I recommend you use these examples of good shape as a reference point. However, be aware that BBLs are far more dangerous than other types of plastic surgery.

Excessive lip fillers are sometimes intentionally used by popular glamour models because they pop well on Instagram. In real life, lip fillers are best in moderation. You can see an example of lips that are plump but not excessive here.

Not everyone should get a nose job, but in some cases it makes an enormous difference. The actress shown a moment ago had a nose job as well as a breast augmentation. Fixating on your nose can make it seem larger than it is, so don't obsess and have it reduced excessively.

Is There A Best Nose?

Nose shape is the element of facial beauty with the largest effect size. I asked men which of the three noses above they preferred. Then a few months later I asked them the same question about the photoshopped images below. A small nose upturned around thirty degrees was the clear winner in both cases.

This casts some doubt on the heartwarming theory that noses are very specific to faces. Nevertheless, if you have a large or even bent nose whose other characteristics are attractive, I don't advise you to change it. Due to the diversity of male tastes, it's not necessary for all women to have the same nose.

As we discussed earlier, the best faces aren't just distinguished by a few obvious traits like noses, but by a large number of small, interacting advantages that collectively add up to a more attractive whole. The sheer number of relevant dimensions is overwhelming. And the kind of rough estimates that work perfectly well for breast augmentation simply can't deal with this level of complexity and subtlety.

Do you trust her?

One approach is to rely on an experienced cosmetic surgeon's professional opinion. Unfortunately it's not always easy to know which surgeon you can trust to tweak the finer details of your face. Today women who wish to optimize their faces can also begin by consulting AI.

I discuss the social and aesthetic impact of AI in my essay “Ultrahumanism.”

Although novel at the time of writing, the method I propose is simple. Use a beautifying face filter to visually transform your face into a more attractive version of itself. Then do what's necessary to make your face look like that better version of you. A face filter may provide useful ideas for cosmetic contouring or fillers that require minimal risk and expense, and useful ideas for surgical intervention as well.

Some changes you see in the filter may be impossible to achieve in reality, but others will be doable or even easy. Ask your surgeon to create a representation of the expected end result to make sure you're satisfied before you move ahead. Don't take any risks you're not comfortable with, and when in doubt, be satisfied with stopping at the most certain improvements.

AI-generated faces are less unique and compelling than the best human faces, but still far more attractive than average faces.

It's important to highlight potential issues. Beautification filters aren't perfected at the time of writing, so this recommendation is a little premature. You shouldn’t assume they provide correct information about every face. The face below was generated by an AI with the prompt "pretty woman," but it's not a good face.

This AI-generated image of a "pretty woman" replicates many common human misconceptions about feminine beauty, including excessive lips, hollow cheeks, and a masculine jawline. It's clearly been trained on images of fashion models in advertisements. You should never blindly trust AI, but always use your own judgment.

While quality and accuracy will improve over time, all existing filters have a more fundamental flaw. They’re not designed to account for supply and demand.

Current AI filters are unlikely to guide you toward a uniquely attractive face like this one, which includes small but interesting "flaws."

By consequence, filters promote generic faces that are pleasing to the majority rather than unique faces that are especially exciting to a minority. This won’t change until professionals design better software. In the meantime, you'll have to decide for yourself whether the face filter is guiding you in a direction that will make a positive impact on your life.

This article may be dedicated to refuting beauty lies. However, at present there's still a social stigma surrounding cosmetic procedures in some parts of the world. So if you live in one of these regions and opt for surgery, it may be prudent to lie about it. You can shift the blame for this little crime to the author. I don't mind.

Fake or real? Are you sure you can tell?

Today some petty women will announce that anyone with nice curves "looks plastic," even when the claim is false, and even when no surgery was involved (here are three "obvious and very fake-looking BBLs"). In other words, they group natural curves and well-done surgery together with an ugly, overdone look to be demeaning.

In the majority of cases this is just jealousy speaking. They can't measure up, so they try to pull their competition down. Instead of taking it to heart, remind yourself that they're insulting you because they feel sexually inferior and have low moral standards. It's an ugly thing to say, but it's true, and their behavior doesn't merit minced words.

Yes, there are women who have this shape without surgery, and no, it doesn't look "plastic." Sometimes it's better to mock the transparently selfish motivations behind mean girls' insults than to turn the other cheek.

In the future improved medical techniques will surely replace the current ones. But where your body is concerned, innovations need to be treated with caution. Their long-term effects may be unknown. If you choose to use new or recently developed cosmetic technologies, please do your research first.

Today’s professional glamour models take advantage of a wide array of procedures that are impractical for the average woman. Typically they won’t admit this in public. You shouldn’t assume you can afford to duplicate their results. And trying to do too much increases the risk something will go wrong. When in doubt, it's wise to use moderation.

Some women are strangely offended by the assertion that plastic surgery works. They shouldn't be. It means you have the power to change your body if and when you want to. Whatever you decide, the option is liberating.

You might be surprised, but studies actually show that cosmetic surgery provides lasting increases to happiness. The biggest gains come from breast surgery. However, studies can be wrong, so if you’re considering a procedure, talk first to trustworthy women who have gone through with it. Ask them if they’re glad they did, and ask your doctor to explain the risks. Men tend to give dishonest or uninformed answers, so in most cases you’re better off not listening to them.

Although women mistakenly assume nose jobs will work better, after their surgery they report much higher long-term satisfaction with boob jobs.

Men’s ignorance about makeup is similar to their ignorance about surgery. Don’t be misled. Those who claim to prefer women without makeup actually prefer “natural-looking” makeup, but don’t realize it. The reality is that all women look better in makeup. Men's beauty advice is sometimes hard to distinguish from sabotage.

Fortunately you can get most of the benefits with a simple and efficient routine that doesn’t require hours every day. Makeup techniques are best learned from instructional videos, so I won't go into any detail here.

Even sex dolls with artificially flawless skin are designed to look like they're wearing makeup. Note that the color of the dress matches and brings out the color of the eyes.

Heavy Instagram-style makeup is meant to be effective when viewed on a small phone screen. To avoid looking clownish, make sure to tone it down for real life. The example below is wearing a little too much eyeshadow.

"The kohl under her eyes had mingled with sweat and tears and collected in the hollows of her face: her unnatural Occidental pallor seemed sickly and ghoulish in the flickering lamplight, like an omen of disaster."

A beauty mistake often seen in fashion advertising is using cosmetic contouring and even buccal fat removal to create or enhance the appearance of hollow cheeks. Like much of high fashion, this has a masculinizing effect worsened by excessively low bodyfat. Tastes do vary, especially where faces are concerned. But most men prefer full cheeks. You can confirm this by reexamining the images in the faces section.

The Moral Case for Cosmetics

Some people criticize cosmetics and cosmetic surgery on moral grounds. But they have it backwards. Maximizing your attractiveness is now a moral imperative, regardless of the means employed. That's not just because beauty is good in itself. Anything that helps make real human relationships more appealing than imaginary but increasingly addictive substitutes like pornography and AI-augmented egirls is a win for humanity. So if someone attacks your decision to improve your appearance, tell her hotter girls make the world a better place. It's true.

I refute arguments against cosmetic surgery in more detail here.
Evidence of good moral character.

4. Hair, skin, and eyes.

The chart below shows the distribution of different hair colors at a major sex doll retailer.

Blonde and red hair are both overrepresented compared to their frequency in the general population, and blondes who would naturally have black hair are especially overrepresented among imaginary women of all kinds. So if you intend to dye your hair, you should consider these colors first.

Strange colors like purple, blue, and green are common in artistic representations of women, and sometimes shown in this article for that reason. But outside an artistic context, men today express a strong preference for naturally occurring colors. This may be merely a matter of fashion. Nevertheless, for the time being I recommend you avoid unusual shades.

Curly hair is not very popular with men, though wavy hair seems to be more popular than straight hair.

While blonde and red hair do tend to have an advantage in general terms, the best hair color for you will ultimately depend on your face and complexion. The famous faces most frequently submitted to my faces survey are actually framed by dark hair.

Is it time to dye your hair?

Hair length is far more important to men than hair color. Not a single beauty example above has short hair! This isn’t an accident. Almost all men dislike short hair. It was nearly absent from their submissions to my favorite faces study.

The shortest hairstyle available at a sex doll retailer that sells over a hundred detachable heads.

Below you can see the thirty standard hairstyle options one sex doll manufacturer offers with their full-body dolls. Styles descending below the breasts occur the most frequently. Most women can increase their attractiveness by wearing their hair longer. You may even want to consider growing it out to waist length.

Of course, there's some individual variability. A bob can look good on the right person. But it’s a mistake to cut your hair shorter. There are hardly any exceptions to this rule. If you've been considering a short hairstyle, please stop.

Classic paintings almost never depict beautiful women with a tan. Women once wore broad-brimmed hats and carried parasols to avoid them. Reader selections for best breast and butt shape are either untanned or lightly tanned, AI girls are untanned more often than not, and tanning is even less common among popular anime girls. The sex-doll torsos discussed earlier also have untanned or lightly tanned skin.

However, tanned and untanned skin occur with similar frequency among the broader range of sex dolls, and uncensored search results display a range of skin tones nearly as diverse as those shown in this article.

Most AI girls aren't tanned.

The data is thus mixed and inconclusive, with evidence against tanning perhaps slightly outweighing evidence in its favor. Tanned skin appears to serve as a fashionable signal whose intrinsic effect on feminine beauty is neutral at best.

Historically, tanning was strongly dispreferred. Is this time different?

You can decide whether and how much to tan based on local conditions and fashions, as well as your personal style. But despite its popularity, there's no firm basis to recommend sunbathing for aesthetic purposes.

Since excessive sun exposure accelerates aging and tanning is unlikely to have a significant positive effect on your appearance, the default choice should be to avoid exposing your skin to more sun than is necessary for good health. Heavy tan lines from sunbathing in bikinis have an especially unfortunate effect, and are best avoided.

If you're very pale and have no tan at all, don't let anyone tell you it makes your skin looks plain and sickly. This view is not supported by contemporary evidence, and it's strongly contradicted by historical representations of beauty.

Tanning: a loss for no gain.

Because people generally perceive brighter colors as prettier than brown, it's natural to assume blue and green eyes are more attractive than brown eyes. However, the data doesn't clearly support this view.

When I surveyed men, a surprising fraction claimed they find eyeglasses attractive. They're nevertheless quite uncommon in imaginary women and erotic imagery. So while glasses may suit a few faces, it's safest to wear contact lenses.

Individual men do sometimes prefer a particular eye color. Yet the frequency of eye colors in sex dolls matches the frequency of eye colors in the population, implying it's a neutral trait on the group level. Academic studies also indicate that colorful eyes provide no advantage. Well-publicized research claiming otherwise is sponsored by companies that sell colored contact lenses, and of dubious quality.

It still seems logical that brighter colors would be more attractive. But the advantage is likely small, and overwhelmed by other factors. There's thus no particular need to change your eye color with contact lenses. Nor is there any harm in doing so if it suits your mood.

Nevertheless, certain eye colors combine well with certain cosmetic, clothing, and hair colors to create a pleasant overall effect, and this does tend to work better with light eyes. For instance, a green scarf will bring out green eyes. So if you have light-colored eyes, take advantage of them.

Matching colors can make your eyes pop.

5. Motion and posture.

An attractive woman is more attractive when moving. Some otherwise beautiful women remain very stiff and still. This is a mistake that makes them less appealing. The effect of movement is so strong that many readers will consider the images in this section pornographic, even though they're clothed and no more revealing than those seen earlier in the article. It's impossible to cover the topic properly without such images, which is why no one else does. To provide you with the most useful and accurate information on feminine beauty, I'll go where others fear to tread. If you think they might bother you, please skip to the next section now.

"It seems you failed to execute the erotic wigglings and jigglings necessary to interest a man as jaded by the inexhaustible supply of flawless females as our dear sultan. Alas, in such cases beauty alone is not enough, and I am forced to provide remedial education in sexual gyrology to the ignorant at my own expense."

A few women have an excellent intuition for attractive motions. They'll find it ridiculous to hear them spelled out in instructions. But the reality is that the majority of women need to learn. Prudish conventional beauty advice fails to explain thoroughly. Men typically aren't aware either, because a good performance creates the illusion of natural spontaneity. They don't spend time to consider that the girls they see on the internet have been coached and rehearsed. And there's nothing wrong with rehearsing. With a little practice, you can create the same illusion.

Swaying hips and bouncing breasts are mesmerizing to men, especially in combination.

A small sway as you walk can have a powerful effect on men, especially if your posture is good. A bounce can show off your chest or rear. You don't need extravagant curves for this. Modest curves are enough. The examples above and below demonstrate how you can incorporate these into your gait. And this unclothed example shows that you can apply the same basic bounce and sway technique with subtlety and casualness.

While fundamentally similar to the previous, this gait is a little too pronounced for everyday circumstances.

High heels encourage a swaying gait, so to look your best you should wear them whenever you can. Some advise a minimum of three inches, but even two will have a beneficial effect.

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To create an attractive sway, wear heels and walk by placing each foot toward the opposite side of your body, as demonstrated in this video. You can strengthen or weaken the effect by increasing or decreasing the lateral displacement of your steps.

I recommend you always walk with a feminine gait. This will support the illusion that it's natural and unstudied. If anyone remarks on it, you should steadfastly maintain that it's "just the way I walk." Match the amount of sway and bounce to the occasion. It's important to use moderation in daily life to ensure you attract the right kind of attention. The minimum dose is the safest, and there's nothing wrong with conservative poise and elegance. In a dance club or behind closed doors, on the other hand, you can be more liberal.

Modest curves are enough to make a powerful impact if you can dance well.

Whether you're walking, standing, or kneeling, the most basic type of attractive motion is a shake or bounce that shows off your curves by causing them to change direction on a slight lag to the rest of your body. This can be done subtly, as in the left image below, or overtly, as in the right image. It goes without saying that the latter is best reserved for private use, but the concept is exactly the same.

The twerking movement being rehearsed in slow motion at the center below is now practiced by large groups in gyms or dance studios. The example shown here is fine. But caution is in order. Despite its popularity, this mass of asses moving with an athletic and almost masculine forcefulness seems grotesque to some men. The left and right images demonstrate that violent movements aren't necessary to be seductive.

Men's critical remarks about strippers and the like may discourage you from trying to copy these examples. But don't take this disdain the wrong way. Context is often what makes the difference between trashy and sexy.

A bouncing monarchiste explains why you shouldn't minimize bodyfat.

You shouldn't be afraid to use the movements shown here in private. The fraction of men who will react badly is quite small, while the fraction of men who want to see them but feel awkward about asking is much larger. If you cede them to paid entertainers you'll only give the latter more power over men than they deserve. That's not morally pure. In fact, it hurts all of us. So don't be trapped by a misguided sense of shame. In the proper context it's morally righteous to be as sexy as possible.

The main thing good examples have in common is an impression of ease and fluidity. However, even timid motions can be more attractive than stillness, and they sometimes have a charming naivete, as in the right and left images above. A lighthearted mood and sense of fun will help to excuse any initial clumsiness. What you should avoid above all is giving the impression that your movements are an unpleasant obligation that doesn't flow from self-expression. Every woman pictured here visibly enjoys putting on a show, including the awkward one at above right and the demure girl shown earlier biting her sweater. This is quite important.

If you're flat and thin with narrow hips, displays of elegance or youthful agility may prove more effective than the type of movement shown above. These are harder to execute and difficult to characterize in writing. Note that runway models aren't reliable exemplars for imitation, because their gaits are sometimes rather aggressive. This is intended to impress you with their confidence so you buy their clothes, not to look good to men.

This is only a small selection from the wide variety of possible movements. It's intended to be a reliable starting point, not a comprehensive encyclopedia. It consists of time-tested images that have ranked near the top of internet search results for years or even decades, and are thus likely to have the broadest and most enduring appeal to men. Nevertheless, better quality examples can be found elsewhere.

Why Explicit Pornography Doesn't Tell Us Much About Beauty

Pornographic actresses are selected primarily for their willingness to perform sexual acts on camera, and only secondarily for their appearance. The most beautiful women have much stronger financial, social, and emotional incentives not to participate. Explicit pornography therefore typically features women of mediocre beauty. It compensates for this deficiency with theatrical, bizarre, and even disgusting behavior that can mislead inexperienced viewers and contradict beauty's role in eroticism.

Beautiful women are more willing to provide solo performances like those shown here because the costs are lower and the incentives are higher. Despite their limitations, these currently offer us the best examples of attractive motions. Steal their tricks, and use them to strengthen your relationship instead of selling your body.

I recommend you seek out popular, high-quality videos of attractive women with a similar body type and study the way they move in different contexts. Solo videos like the three examples below will be especially instructive. Pay attention to those with a style and mood you like. Then adapt their movements to work for you. Don't try to put together a dance routine. Simple is best, and many videos may be too involved. You'll have to do some experimentation to learn what works in real life. Be aware that men do vary in which motions they prefer to see.

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Because this is a respectable and technically safe for work article, there are limits to what I'll show here. It's up to you to find unclothed videos. 

You'll get the fastest results by practicing in a mirror or on video. Start by imitating your favorite from the images here, and repeat until your own video matches the model. When it does, you'll be confident you're looking good. You can learn each motion in just minutes, or a few hours at most. That's a better return for your time than any other beauty technique.

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Some motions are so easy that the clumsiest person can learn them in a few minutes. And they still work.

If you have a partner you feel comfortable with, you can present the search for his favorite motion as a humorous game where you playfully demonstrate various alternatives. This creates a low-pressure means to figure out what he really likes and improve your technique.

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Men disagree about the best butt size. Not all appreciate this look, and some even find it unattractive. But if you have the rare combination of a large rear and a small waist you're going to be courted almost exclusively by men who want it. So don't be afraid of playing it up.

If you're too shy to use any of these motions yet, try gradually introducing sway into your gait as described earlier. Increase it a little each week from an almost imperceptible starting point so no one notices the change. This should help to break the ice. Then you can move on to using subtle movements like this one.

Facial expressions, and especially expressive eye motions, can also make a valuable contribution. So do remember to pay attention to the eyes when you watch example videos. When possible you should look your partner in the eye while you perform these movements, without, of course, expecting him to maintain eye contact in return.

The "killshot" expression, discussed in the section on faces, has special power. It combines three seemingly contradictory elements: fear, pleasure, and painful longing. Practice in a mirror until you can make the composite expression without any sign of artificiality. Obviously you shouldn't use it at random. You'll need to wait for, or create, an appropriate circumstance.

Expressions that feature a slightly open mouth are usually more attractive than those where the mouth remains closed. Lip biting can also have an erotic effect.

If you have a particularly youthful face you can win hearts by making a show of cute and girlish mannerisms. This will fall flat unless you're the appropriate type, so evaluate yourself honestly before you try it. Neoteny has lower durability than any other aspect of beauty. By contrast, most of the motions shown previously are still effective for fit middle-aged women.

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In this viral video an adult woman used an AI filter and childish expressions to push neoteny to an extreme. While some reacted with horror or confusion, it nevertheless received countless ecstatic comments from adoring men.

It's true that sophisticated traditional dances are more beautiful and more impressive than any of the movements shown in this article. But while they require more skill, they don't achieve better results in today's environment. People may be impressed by ballroom dancing, but being impressed and actually caring are not the same thing.

Beauties from a bygone age.

Because there's so little hard data on motion preferences, I asked men to rate all the images in this section. You can see the results in the galleries below, presented in order of popularity. Men aren't good at separating motions from models, so one should always assume they're rating both. Recall that I intentionally chose dated gifs for these examples because they provide evidence of enduring appeal. Newer videos would receive higher scores.

These results require an important caveat beyond the usual warning about surveys. The votes show which images are popular, not which are best. Some popular motions may not work for your body type. Moreover, your lover may be most aroused by unpopular motions. That's why experimentation is indispensable. You should also vary the motions you use to avoid inducing boredom. Don't just stop at one or two easy and popular motions. Try something new once in a while.

The raw popularity scores are particularly misleading where rear motions are concerned. As explained previously, men disagree about which butt size is best, and around a third prefer large. So when a third of men rate a big butt motion "very attractive," that's a good score, because it implies all of the men who like big butts like the motion. Indeed, such men may greatly prefer these motions despite their apparently low scores.

You might still worry that if you use sexy motions your lover will think less of you. So I specifically asked men whether they'd find them attractive or off-putting coming from their girlfriend. When shown an example from this section, a stunning 99% of men said they wished their girlfriend would use attractive motions in the bedroom. Not all men like the same motions, but all men do enjoy motions of some kind. It's only a matter of figuring out which ones your lover prefers.

The wide appeal of a feminine gait is worth highlighting again. Nearly everyone likes it, you have fine control over the degree of emphasis, and you can even use it in public, making it one of the best tools at your disposal.

The motion at center below is also worthy of special mention. Apart from a basic gait, this was the highest-rated motion that’s effective for any body type. It received a warm welcome from men even though the model has hardly any curves on display. I recommend every woman learn to imitate it exactly.

Before moving on to the next section I'll take a moment to address posture. Common sense already dictates that you should follow the normal rules of good posture. Hunching your shoulders inward is a widespread error you should take care to avoid.

Due to desk jobs and excessive screen time, poor posture is more common today than ever before. You can find stretches and exercises that claim to help, but most of these aren't sufficient to compensate for hours a day spent hunched over your phone. If you struggle with posture, I recommend you try rucking (walking with a weighted backpack) several times a week. This strengthens the muscles needed for good posture and encourages better habits.

A good exercise for repairing bad posture. Be sure to remain upright and avoid hunching under your pack while you walk.

The less familiar posture shown below is also an important one to learn.

Men prefer to see the rear curled outward and upward, with a concave curve in the lower back, and as a rule erotic drawings and photos present it that way even if no sexual activity is implied, regardless of whether the figure is sitting or standing. Look again at the earlier examples and you'll see it repeated over and over, whenever the perspective is from behind. High heels encourage this position, which is yet another reason to wear them.

The same principle holds in a bent position. It's more attractive to curl your rear out and pull your lower back inward than to do the reverse. This posture can become rather lewd when it's exaggerated, so as usual, you'll have to be sensitive to the context.

The above example is rather obvious. Below you can see a subtler error that's very common. The posture on the right is much more attractive than the posture on the left, and indispensable in the bedroom. So practice until you do it correctly without thinking about it.

Movement and posture can give you a real advantage over stiff women who look prettier than you in a photo. Not to mention sex dolls. They're free, easy to learn, and offer substantial benefits to women of all types. So don't just lie back and think of England. Put your beauty in motion.

The best standing and bent postures ultimately derive from this kneeling one. Similarly, the most attractive facial expressions derive from those that occur during sex.

As I'll explain in the next section, it's especially attractive to move and pose on your own initiative, without waiting for your partner to prompt you. This applies to subtle and frank motions alike.

After you've learned the steps well you can stop thinking about them and just enjoy dancing.
Second Nature Trumps First

Our society assigns such high value to beauty, romance, and sex that today many consider these too sacred to be the subject of study. We want everything to work intuitively, like magic, and love stories encourage us to think it can. This error is preventing our relationships from being all that they could be. Beauty, sex, and even romance are akin to a formal dance, which flows more enjoyably and “naturally” after the basic steps are learned. No one is born knowing how to tango, and so it is too for fellatio and eye shadow. 
"To maintain a mood appropriate for the scheduled striptease, you must never entertain the petty thought that you are betraying your ancestors, your family, and your people by enthusiastically offering your virgin body to an evil foreign monarch, or at any rate one remarkably indifferent to human suffering and, to your unrefined Occidental perceptions, essentially indistinguishable from some lesser individual who is actually evil."

6. The most common misconception about seduction.

A course in seduction would be beyond the scope of this article, but one simple point is worthy of mention.

Femininity, even in the most traditional sense, was never just passivity or subordination. It encompasses the power to charm, to inspire, and to tempt, without which men would lack the motivation to do all that they could. This applies to the physical realm as well as the spiritual.

A common myth is that women are most attractive when they're passive and submissive. This is not the case. While always being forward is too masculine and submissiveness is often desirable, consistent passivity is unexciting. It raises no questions and elicits no interest. To be seductive you should mix forwardness and passivity in the correct proportions. This is not a matter of taking a masculine role, because feminine forwardness is different from masculine dominance. Naturally, you can't duplicate seduction techniques men would use on you and expect them to work in reverse.

Motions or poses like these can show off your body while maintaining plausible deniability.

I'll draw your attention to some familiar evidence. The most common titillation scene in movies and television aimed at men is simply an attractive woman undressing without being asked. In fact, it's much more common than a man undressing her or asking her to undress, let alone forcing her to do so. This is not an accident. Men don't find passive submission optimally attractive, and they prefer enthusiastic partners over unwilling ones.

Academic research on fantasies, pornography statistics, and an analysis of popular fiction all support the idea that violence and power dynamics aren't important erotic triggers for the majority of men. Much like women, men want to be wanted. And this shouldn't be a surprise, because a partner who wants you is always more reliable, and therefore more valuable, than a partner who doesn't. This remains true no matter how strong and powerful you are. Most men are reluctant to even request all the things they'd enjoy, let alone try to compel you. By waiting for you to act on your own initiative, they can see a clearer signal of your affection.

The Hidden Contradiction in Male Sexual “Domination”

It may be tempting to project a lust for domination onto men, but this gives you the wrong idea of what actually turns them on. Women are far more aroused by male violence and dominance than men are. Men who engage in consensual violence beyond mild rough behavior usually do so to fulfill female sexual fantasies, not for their own pleasure. This means consensual violent male “domination” is in truth male submission to female wishes, and quite the reverse of genuine domination. If you want to be truly submissive, then please him without compulsion, using the information provided here.

If you reexamine the erotic imagery in the previous section, you'll notice women are always presented as warm and inviting and in a state of arousal or pleasure, never cold, hostile, resistant, or indifferent. Acting cold and hostile and waiting for men to conquer you is rarely an effective approach, and the longer a relationship lasts, the more counterproductive it becomes. Evincing a low sex drive reduces your sex appeal too, and to an even greater extent.

Enthusiasm is inherently more attractive than reticence. So much so that men fantasize about women who are unrealistically enthusiastic. However, this doesn't mean immediately giving men everything they want is a good idea. Part of seduction is about being elusive, and it's harmful to be too easy too soon. People don't value things they obtain too readily. After you've created interest, allow it time to grow in his mind. A little hunger is the best spice.

Forwardness isn't the same as masculine aggression.

Consider the stereotypical seductress, often a villain. She will flirt, then play hard to get, disappear, and then suddenly appear and drop her clothes, and the male will find her unexpected forwardness irresistible. In contrast, the slut will throw herself at anyone without hesitation, and the boring girl will quietly do nothing.

These stereotypes have a lesson to teach us. By adopting a flirtatious and coy attitude, using subtle motions to draw attention to your body, and punctuating passivity and elusiveness with frank sexual displays, you can use your beauty to maximum effect. The right combination of push and pull will both confuse and excite men.

Create temptation.

The correct approach to seduction changes over time. In the early stages it's best to tempt him subtly and then wait for him to pursue. But contrary to what you may have heard, frank sexual advances initiated by women are highly beneficial in the context of an established relationship, and can completely change men's attitude toward you. You'll be the hot girlfriend instead of the cute but boring one. And that makes your relationship more likely to endure.

"I've been waiting for you to get home."

In fact, seduction is more important when you're in a relationship than when you're looking for one, and the longer a relationship lasts, the more sexually forward you should be. Sadly, most women fail to understand this and instead allow their lover's interest to wane over time.

Fulfilling Male Fantasies Is Easy, Actually

Fellatio is the most common male fantasy cited in academic literature, and by far the easiest to fulfill. Indeed, if the poll above is even half true, it's one of the things men most desire. Only about ten percent are indifferent, though sensitivity does vary.

It's important to realize that men who enjoy fellatio won't necessarily ask for it. As with much of seduction, men prefer that you volunteer, so you need to judge your lover's enjoyment by his reactions and behavior, not his requests.

According to surveys nearly half of women enjoy giving fellatio. This is a seductive advantage they shouldn’t hesitate to exploit liberally. Provided your timing is good, initiating fellatio unexpectedly can be especially compelling, because it triggers men on several levels. However, to be clear, forcing yourself to do things you don't like is a bad idea. It sets up expectations that won't be sustainable in a long-term relationship. Seduction is really about freeing yourself to behave in a way you'll enjoy, and the best approach will differ from woman to woman.

If you're hesitant to trust this advice, perhaps the polls below will persuade you. A huge majority of men say they want their lover to take the initiative and be sexually forward in a relationship. They just don't know how to tell her.

Your lover may confirm the suggestions given here if you ask him. But I recommend you don't. Good communication is normally important. However, when it comes to demonstrating enthusiasm, a premeditated or businesslike attitude would dampen the effect. If you've long been passive in an established relationship, you can justify the change by first complaining about an unusually strong hormonal cycle. Buy some chocolate, leave it on the counter, and then act emotional about something unimportant. Afterwards your behavior will seem spontaneous and natural.

Men can't tell you to do what they desire most, which is for you to do what they most desire without being told, and to do it teasingly, motivated by the pleasure you take in being desired by someone you desire in return. This seemingly convoluted psychology is just a consequence of the fact that everyone wants to be wanted, and it's the key to understanding seduction.

Feminine means of initiation fall into two basic categories: visual display and direct touch. A simple way to begin is to partly undress, and then tempt him with one of the less vigorous movements suitable for your body type. When initiating through direct touch you should usually move gently with the intent to give pleasure. Brusque and assertive touch is useful as an occasional spice, but it's more masculine and less reliably seductive.

Wear sexy clothes while cooking and doing chores.

Although playing hard to get isn't good idea in an established relationship, you can still build anticipation through other means. For instance, titillate him when time or circumstances don't allow for escalation, and then resume later. Or incorporate subtly attractive motions into your daily routine around the house. And when you're at home, always wear attractive clothing. It doesn't make sense to save your pretty clothes for the outside world and dress in ugly things when you're alone with your lover, but this is exactly how most women behave.

"Oh, you're already late for work?"

Don't be cold toward your lover because you're afraid of seeming slutty. It's true that men value promiscuous women less, and that being too forward with strangers will invite distrust. But what men want in the long run is faithfulness and exclusivity, not coldness or indifference. These are not the same. In fact, if you're too cold they're more likely to stray to women who apply the ideas just presented. Don't wait for them to tell you so, because it's unlikely they ever will. And remember that it's morally good to be sexy.

"Am I in your way?" As a rough guideline, women in an established relationship should initiate sex around a third of the time. Always waiting for your lover to initiate makes you seem boring and uninterested and reduces your sex appeal.
Lusty but Chaste: A Raradox

What most men desire for a relationship is a woman who exudes both high sexual energy and low promiscuity, or even chastity. In practice these traits are rarely found together, but they involve no logical contradiction. To catch the best quality mate, signal both at the same time.
A high libido makes you more desirable when it's combined with low promiscuity. Feigning a low libido is the wrong way to display purity and fidelity, because it actually makes you less attractive.

You don't need to be confident to seduce. In fact, bashfulness and timidity can be seductive, and in some circumstances it might even be worth simulating them. That doesn't contradict the advice already given, because shyness and forwardness aren't actually opposites, just as lustfulness and chastity aren't actually opposites. For instance, these AI girls' expressions and poses are timid and provocative at the same time.

The appeal of timidity isn't limited to eroticism. Watch Audrey Hepburn turn on the charm in this famous movie scene.

The apparent contradictions are easily explained. A man finds a woman especially desirable when she exhibits both bashfulness (implying youth, femininity, and low promiscuity), and also a desire for him that's strong enough to overcome this bashfulness (implying vitality, love, and faithfulness). It's obvious why these characteristics would make for a good mate. Nevertheless, there's more than one way to be seductive, and it's best to find an approach that suits your character. I'm underlining the value of fearfulness and uncertainty here because today's popular advice overlooks it and exaggerates the value of confidence.

You may be troubled to know that a large majority of men have fantasies involving multiple partners. Yet it's possible to simulate variety and multiplicity by periodically making significant changes to your clothing, makeup, and hair. Gradual, minor alterations will have little effect, because the purpose is to look like a “new” woman. Men's taste for variety is strong enough that even cutting your hair short, one of the worst beauty mistakes you can make, will briefly increase your lover's interest. Fortunately there are innumerable better ways to vary your style that can make seduction easier in a lasting relationship.

The purpose of all the maneuvers I've listed in this section doesn't lie only in the pleasure you might give your lover in brief moments here and there. Rather, by eliciting desire and giving pleasure in the most impactful ways, you create for yourself an erotic aura that transcends any individual moment and positively colors your lover's overall perception of your character. And this in turn increases your feeling of desirability, enhancing your own enjoyment.

Become irresistible.

Seduction is a complex topic that merits an article of its own, which will, alas, never be written. For lack of time I've described it in broad strokes using many rough generalizations, and it's up to you to work out the specifics. Not all men have the same tastes. Experiment, then judge your success by his reactions. As with attractive motions, the unavoidable short-term risk of embarrassment or awkwardness is more than justified by the long-term benefits you'll enjoy after you get it right.

An expression of slightly fearful anticipation can be seductive.
Sexual Compatibility and Pornography

The evidence below suggests a causal relationship between women's use of pornography and an escalating taste for violence. Women who only watch nonviolent porn may not be subject to this effect. It should be clear from the account of seduction you've just read that training yourself to need more intense violence will make it harder to find men who can satisfy you without resorting to artifice.

7. Personality and individuality.

As far as beauty is concerned, your personality doesn't matter very much. This article isn't a complete guide to life or relationships, so if you want to read about personality in a larger context you should look elsewhere. However, you might first ask yourself whether beautiful girls with bland personalities, or even terrible character, really struggle to catch the mates they want.

In fairytales mean and conniving girls always lose, and morally admirable heroines (not pictured) just happen to be more beautiful.

The vast majority of us prefer a physically attractive lover with character flaws to an ugly angel. This is an uncomfortable truth we do our best to ignore. But it's actually a good thing. It implies that you don't need to distort your personality or pretend to be someone else to find love. You're free to be yourself.

Women who bring up personality when the topic is beauty are often afraid they can't compete on appearance alone. Shifting the discussion to personality allows them to surreptitiously change the game to one they think they can win. Since the scorekeeping is nebulous, at least they know they can't lose. And as a bonus, they seem "nice" (the most common motive for dishonesty).

"But I'm great at embroidery."

This clever trick is counterproductive here, because our goal is to improve your appearance, not measure your value as a human. When you're learning to swim you shouldn't excuse the flaws in your stroke by bragging about unrelated skills.

Nevertheless, even on a purely visual level, expressing your personality does help a little. More importantly, it makes it easier for the right mate to find you.

It's not necessary to develop a completely individual style, especially below the neck. And while the unique features of your face will often determine which men are interested and which aren't, they're largely out of your control. So get the basics right with the generic beauty techniques we've discussed above, then add some touches of character in the details. You can do this with clothing choices, accessories, or even makeup.

Be aware that other people don't value individuality or originality as much as you want them to. In practice, quality trumps uniqueness.

Personality and individuality may have limited relevance to beauty, but this doesn't imply that all women should conform to a single ideal. Appealing to a minority taste can work too. Remember, it doesn't matter if most men are indifferent to you as long as some of them value you highly.

"Give them first a week alone with a strapping young man, a hookah, and an inexhaustible supply of hashish, and they break with reliable consistency."

At times the right strategy is simply to make the best of what you already have. But don’t use this as an excuse to neglect basics or maintain unhealthy habits.

Cars come in many colors of paint, but never with five wheels.
It's healthiest to think of the fundamentals of corporeal beauty as mechanical and impersonal, with no deeper meaning than the best proportions for a car you might drive. Personal expression happens in the details. Although the opposite view might sound more heartwarming, it can scar you emotionally and block the road to self-improvement. If men ignore you, it's probably not because your soul is unworthy of love, but simply because your “car” doesn't drive as well as others. And cars can be fixed without replacing the driver.
"Mechanical, like the endless grinding of the stars."

8. Beauty and aging.

No one seriously doubts women are more beautiful when they’re younger. However, the claim that they hit a "wall" at thirty and suddenly turn ugly isn't true. It’s possible for older women to remain attractive, so you shouldn’t give up just because you reach a certain age.

The techniques I’ve mentioned in this article work for older women just as well as younger women, and may even offer older women greater benefits. Careful attention to diet and exercise is essential. Of course, makeup and surgery also help.

The most common beauty mistake among women over forty is adopting a short hairstyle for a “fresh and youthful look.” This invariably has the opposite effect. Don't dabble in androgyny when your fertility is fading. Short hair makes middle-aged women look older.

Some claim curves don’t age well. This one of the biggest beauty myths, and only applies if you don't take care of yourself. In fact, youthful skin is the least durable element of attractiveness. Because your other assets diminish faster, your basic silhouette is responsible for an increasing fraction of your sex appeal over time.

Since men who care more about curves appear to care less about youth, curvaceous women are more likely to attract mates who will stay sexually satisfied in the long term.

In other words, curves actually become more valuable as you age, provided you maintain a healthy weight and avoid or correct sagging. For the same reason, breast implants (and breast lifts) are especially useful for older women, including those who never had curves in their youth.

This photo was taken at age 54. Long hair and implants work for older women as well as younger, and outlast youthful skin by many years.

Nevertheless, there are limits to what can be achieved today, and it’s important to be realistic. Creams and lotions currently advertised as rejuvenating have little real effect. Surgery can’t truly reverse aging, and trying too hard to erase the years will do more harm than good. Only genuine rejuvenation technology will get that job done.

The future can be much brighter than you imagine.

Rejuvenation medicine is more plausible than it might sound. Because aging is simply an accumulation of damage, reversing it is no different in principle to repairing an old car. Of course, the cellular machinery in our skin is far more sophisticated than an engine, so the task is quite difficult. But we'll accomplish it one day. And if demand is vocal enough, that day may even come soon enough for you to benefit. Public advocacy for rejuvenation research is a great way to help. I explain further here.

For now, however, no woman looks better at forty than at twenty-five. And while you age, the most eligible males are snatched away by other women. If you want the best long-term partner you can get, you shouldn’t waste time. Those who tell you otherwise don’t have your interests at heart. Find him sooner rather than later, then use modern technology and good health practices to retain your beauty longer.

9. The top seven ways to look more attractive.

To summarize, here's a simplified checklist of the seven most effective ways to look more attractive. These may seem obvious, but hardly any women today cover them all.

1. Maintain a healthy weight.
2. Wear makeup.
3. Wear long hair.
4. Wear clothes that fit properly at the waist.
5. Do strength training focused on the glutes.
6. Get breast implants in the 500-800cc range if you're comfortable with the risks.
7. Get a nose job if you have a distinctly bad nose.

Bonus: Learn to move attractively.

Start at the top and work down. Points 1, 4, 5, and 6 will help develop or enhance an hourglass shape. Points 2, 3, and 7 will take care of the rest.

The loose waist of these jean shorts is an exception that proves the rule, because the bare midriff makes the model's waist visible.

Since seven is a more auspicious number than eight, I've listed motion as a bonus point. It actually has a multiplicative effect on all the others. Fear of seeming ridiculous during the learning curve prevents most women from taking what's actually an easy win, and perhaps the lowest-hanging fruit in the realm of feminine beauty. If you persist a short while and get it right, men won't be able to look away.

Implants and ruffled skirts with a fitted waist can create an hourglass figure for a woman who would otherwise seem too straight and thin.

Some women may feel uncomfortable to see implants included here. If you're opposed to surgery or have a low tolerance for risk, feel free to ignore this point. Nevertheless, breast augmentation can be one of the most effective beauty interventions. Omitting it from the list to make readers feel more comfortable would go against the high-minded principles that motivate this article.

The fashion industry wants you to think you can compensate with expensive designer handbags. You can't. They have no effect on your attractiveness. 

Take a moment to consider just how little time and money is necessary to look more attractive. Only points six and seven on the list above require a significant commitment of resources. Most women aren't failing because they're not trying hard enough. They're failing because they're trying too hard to do the wrong things. Before you try harder, aim better.

Women who are first coming to grips with the facts about feminine beauty sometimes jump to the conclusion that only a boob job really matters. There are six more points on this list of essentials, and many smaller tricks explained elsewhere in this article that will also help to increase your attractiveness.

This top-seven list isn't exhaustive. However, as you go beyond it your returns will diminish. One of the most common beauty mistakes is to obsess over irrelevancies. Conventional beauty advice reinforces this mistake by encouraging you to worry about details that don't matter so you buy stuff that doesn't help.

I've kept it simple for good reason. Prioritize the basics and don't stress about the rest.

This article emphasizes feminine curves because they’re the main object of beauty lies and an important component of attractiveness. However, faces, expressions, mannerisms, and behaviors also contribute to sex appeal. Some women with minimal curves still have high sex appeal because they excel in these other areas.
Four Bonus Tips For Curveless Girls Who Want More Sex Appeal

1. Hit glutes exercises hard. The less natural volume you have the greater their effect.
2. Consider going braless where local customs allow. Flat women can often get away with this when others can't.
3. Adopt youthful mannerisms, clothes, and hair. Men who like curveless girls tend to have a high neoteny preference. This works best for short women. Tall women should instead cultivate elegance in posture and movement.
4. Fellatio can draw sexual attention toward the face, which may play to your strengths.

XIII. Answering objections.

Here I'll directly answer the most common objections to this article. If you're already in agreement, you may want to skip to the next section.

A divine beauty contest. Note that the painter gave all three goddesses the same face.

1. “This article objectifies women.”

“The objectification of women” is a harmful meme we should all reject. Why? Because it uses the word “objectify” to conflate two distinct concepts.

1. Being treated like an inanimate thing (dehumanization)
2. Being perceived and acted on by a subject

1 is bad, but 2 can be good. The meme's payload is to denigrate 2 by association with 1.

It's okay to want to be seen.

Because many women enjoy being perceived and acted on, conflating this with dehumanization sets a psychological trap for them. It persuades them that they ought to have moral objections to their own enjoyment, and that conventional relations of male and female are inherently bad.

A human enjoying being the object of male attention.

There's nothing morally wrong with appealing to the male gaze. And you're not psychologically defective if you enjoy it. In fact, you're completely normal. So when you want to criticize dehumanization, do it explicitly instead of spreading the "objectification" meme. This meme actually hurts women.

Bitter professors have created a series of toxic memes intended to poison heterosexual relationships. They camouflage them as pro-female. Don't be fooled. They're not.

Finally, the purpose of this article is to empower women by offering them the truth. Not to dehumanize them. Any reader smarter than a sex doll should be able to understand that I've presented dolls and anime girls as useful examples of men's visual preferences, not as a recommendation to be vapid. Beautiful, intelligent, wholesome, human, and an object of desire: yes, it's really possible to be all these things at once.

Enjoying the male gaze on an idyllic summer day.
Sour Grapes

Because plain women don't have the opportunity to enjoy the male gaze, some of them try to spoil it for you by making you feel guilty or weird. You're not. Just tune them out.

2. “Your conclusions are obvious.” And, “Your conclusions are wrong.”

I agree that some of the conclusions are obvious. Indeed, the first words of this article are, “The facts about feminine beauty are simple and intuitive, even obvious.” However, things that are obvious to some aren't obvious to others. I receive a large volume of negative and even hateful comments denying any of it is true. Most of it includes slander directed at me personally. I'll tell this story in detail so you can understand just why beauty lies are so persistent.

Naive readers might find it hard to believe that a single free article, purportedly written in this highly aesthetic font by an Oriental sex slaver, could really provide more accurate and useful information about feminine beauty than the totality of previously published academic research (generated at a cost to the public of eight figures in professorial salaries). Yet in an age dominated by liars, incompetents, and frauds, could it really be otherwise?

The public objects to my obvious conclusions vociferously. They can get nasty! If you haven't experienced it firsthand, you can't imagine the amount of hate I'm subjected to for sharing the information you've just read. Many girls seem to believe that denigrating me, willfully misrepresenting my writing, or suppressing my data will make them more beautiful. (It won't.) Opposition has been so consistently fierce that I regret having wasted my time on a subject that's brought me so much trouble and so little personal benefit instead of pursuing my many other interests. If you've read this far, I sincerely hope you've gotten more from Dispelling Beauty Lies than I have.

Journalists can be worse still, as the example below makes clear. This offended journalist jumped straight into ad hominems without bothering to read more than a few lines of my writing. She dug up a months-old joke and used it to misrepresent my work to over 600,000 people, and ignored many requests to correct the record. She went on to attack my novels despite reading no further than the chapter titles, telling the public they're erotica when they're actually comedy, as any intelligent reader can verify in a few minutes. All because I provide evidence men like more curves than she has. Pretty lies might not make you pretty, but that doesn't mean ugly lies work any better.

Censors, however, are not to be outdone. After a set of social media posts summarizing my "obvious" conclusions began to go viral, content moderators shadowbanned them to prevent their spread. Even links to this article have been removed repeatedly. New accounts under new names did nothing to escape the pattern. Explicit pornography and extreme politics are demonstrably less suppressed than my writing on beauty.

Social media company employees have censored this article. Can you believe it?

Today's professional censors leave unpopular dissent alone to create the illusion of free speech. But when ideas they dislike begin to catch on, they manipulate procedural outcomes to tip the scales against their dissemination and favor their own cherished causes instead. For instance, through the inconsistent application of vague rules. By maintaining plausible deniability in this fashion they can shape society invisibly and pass off the result as the will of the public.

Corporate employees aren't the most important censors. Social media algorithms are set up in a way that allows a collective to silence ideas they don't like by downvoting, blocking, and reporting them. This can be exploited by a formal organization using a network of bots, or by randoms acting in aggregate. Are there really women out there so petty that they'd downvote, block, and report accurate information just for making them feel less attractive? To ask the question is to answer it.

It makes sense for plain women to silence praise for attractive features they lack and promote slander instead. This strengthens their hand by demoralizing their competition.

To irrefutably debunk the claim that my conclusions are obvious and everyone already agrees with them, the gallery below comprises the complete and unedited reaction to this article on a popular beauty forum. No, I don't expect you to read it all. I'm posting it here as a matter of public record. The chart shows the fraction of upvotes for positive, neutral, and negative comments. The woman who originally shared the link was shamed into deleting it, and later reposts were removed by moderators.

Fallacious reasoning, misplaced vanity, dishonesty, deception, defamation, and an overpowering urge to torture and execute the messenger are all on vivid display among my critics. And with tactics like those, who could lose?

Few are willing to risk reputational martyrdom for such an absurd cause.

Because we don't compare notes on taboo topics, there can be huge gaps in knowledge that we aren't aware of. These gaps reduce our collective quality of life. So the obvious needs to be stated. And not all of the conclusions in this article are entirely obvious.

Much of the analysis I've presented is entirely novel. Most women really don't know some of the key facts explained above. If they did, there'd be no reason to resort to censorship, manipulation, and deceit to conceal them.

Finally, when an attractive gait can be learned within a day but is hardly ever seen, it's clear that very few women have fully assimilated the truth about feminine beauty.

Sex dolls, erotic drawings, and AI girls are much better sources of information about male tastes than the statistics about centerfolds (from a single magazine) long relied on by academic researchers.

3. “Normal men don't buy sex dolls or look at anime girls. So, your conclusions are invalid.” And, “Normal women don't buy dildos. So, they prove nothing about the size women really prefer.” And, “This article is just about the tastes of porn-sick men. Not real, healthy tastes.”

It's true that most men don't buy sex dolls. But it's not true that the men who do buy them have aesthetic tastes that differ dramatically from the rest. Read carefully. The data from many sources confirms the same basic conclusions. These sources include not only sex dolls, cartoons, and AI girls, but also statues, paintings, search results, centerfolds, stereotypes, and common sense.

Yes, "normal" men like this too.

If you're grasping for excuses to dismiss all of it, you're rationalizing because you don't like the answer. And if the median sex doll seems like an abnormal representation of feminine beauty to you, you ought to take a step back and think harder. While some critics try to describe it as bizarre, fetishistic, and extreme, it's really just a conventional “bombshell” figure.

4. “The love goddess examples in this article are cherry-picked, and they don't prove anything about today.”

Historical representations of feminine beauty aren't random. In fact, they show a definite pattern. As we've discussed, it's not hard to find variations and exceptions. But if you latch on to exceptions and pretend they're the rule, you're making a mistake.

Nevertheless, we live in the present, not the past. There's no reason to rely on the assumption that beauty standards never vary. Although historical archetypes of beauty can occident us in the right general direction, the contemporary data is more relevant and more reliable. And this contemporary data supports our conclusions.

Showing a little too much ear.

5. “This entire article is about how men like big boobs, but I don't have/want/like them, therefore you're totally wrong, and also evil. They don't matter at all. Delete your website right now.”

Would you be this angry if I said men like girls with large ears?

No. You wouldn't.

But why not?

The Maid Test

You're leaving on holiday for a month and need to hire a maid to care for your wealthy husband while you're gone. Two slim young women apply for the position. They're identical in every feature, except one has remarkably large breasts and the other does not. Which will you hire to minimize the risk of infidelity? Your answer reveals what you really think about breast size and attractiveness.
What could go wrong?

6. “You write too positively about makeup, implants, and other cosmetic surgery.”

Beauty isn't a game with rules. But if it were, "cheat to win" would be good advice. Anything less is an unforced surrender to genetic luck.

Breast augmentation is extremely common in glamour models, and more common in the general population than most people suspect. The large majority of women with implants are glad they have them, but keep quiet because of the social stigma. In an article that aims at the truth, it's entirely correct to write positively.

A good set of large implants can give you a substantial advantage, because a significant fraction of men are obsessed with big breasts.

The approximate breast size and shape preferred by the average man. 99% of women can only achieve this look with a breast augmentation. So why shouldn't they?

The primary material reason not to go under the knife is the risk of complications or a botched surgery. The guidelines provided in this article are reasonable and measured, but it's impossible to eliminate risk entirely. That's why I highlight successful cosmetic surgery, but stop short of advising it for all women.

7. “The beauty standard described in this article is heteronormative.”

Yes.

I'm concerned with determining the facts about straight men's tastes and the most effective techniques to satisfy them. Not with enforcing or subverting norms. How you use this information is up to you. You might be surprised to learn that transsexuals intent on duplicating men's ideal female body have been more receptive than the average woman to whom this article was originally addressed.

AI-generated erotic art. 

Most heterosexual women today would be unwilling to accept and profit from the strongest conceivable evidence that straight men consider the figure above ideal. Their indifference to heterosexual tastes seems inexplicably absolute. Instead they chase fashionable beauty standards shaped by gay men. Perhaps they too secretly wish to be trans?

An AI girl. How many heterosexual women are keen to emulate her, and why is the number so low?

8. “You claim all men like the same thing, but I don't like that thing, your article is wrong, you are dumb.”

No, I explicitly and repeatedly state otherwise. This is what it looks like when all men like the same thing:

And this is what it looks like when men like different things:

This article is intended for intelligent people with good reading comprehension and the ability to understand bar charts, as well as the logic of supply and demand. If you do not meet these criteria, please find a simpler beauty article to read instead of criticizing one you can't follow.

9. “This article is just an elaborate justification of your personal tastes.”

While some of the illustrations have been arbitrarily chosen by the author, the data has not. The reasoning is objective and honest, and applies generally. If you dislike the models below, you can indulge in an ad hominem. But it's not that easy to dismiss the conclusions.

In point of fact, many of the photos were submitted by readers. They don't necessarily represent the author's tastes.

10. “No one believes you and this article isn't helping anyone. Are you just trying to be mean?”

There are two groups who readily accept the truth. The first is men. The second is women who are already very attractive. Both of these groups have firsthand knowledge that what people publicly claim is beautiful isn't what men actually respond to. They're happy to read a coherent explanation of the reality they already see.

However, this article aims to help smart and open-minded women of average attractiveness, as well as women who are victims of an eating disorder. If you're one of these women you may have trouble accepting the truth, even if you recognize it subconsciously.

It actually doesn't matter if you accept the data I've presented. Besides, we all know long arguments can obscure the truth as easily as they can reveal it. What does matter is whether acting on the claims increases your success with men and your quality of life. So keep an open mind and a pragmatic attitude, and try the beauty tips above, starting with those that require the smallest investment and the minimum risk. They will help, and that's the important thing.

11. What is the “monarchiste” body type?

The monarchiste body type is a voluptuous and pronounced hourglass. The term was inspired by a real woman who resembled the model below, and described herself as a monarchiste awaiting the restoration.

Painted monarchiste.

This body type is still very popular with men. It was once common in paintings and considered the pinnacle of feminine beauty. But it's particularly ill-served by current fashions. Monarchistes today often dress badly and underestimate their own attractiveness. To rectify this situation, it's worth singling them out for praise with an amusing and historically resonant term.

After the victory of the suffragettes there was an abrupt devaluation of the hourglass figure that's evident even in orientalist paintings from the period. But men's affection for curves didn't vanish when fashion turned against them.

12. “I want to be a trophy wife in a social circle of wealthy status-seekers. Shouldn't I copy the high-status look promoted by today's media and fashion world instead of the 'truth' you write about?”

Probably. But look out for your husband's secretary. You should also ask yourself if a man who'd marry a status symbol instead of a woman he's actually attracted to is really the kind of man you want. As time wears on, your desire for him may not survive the nagging thought that he's emasculated himself just to impress others of his social class.

Some of today's elites are trapped in a negative-sum game where they sacrifice beauty to win status points. This game is refereed by fashion and art critics in places like New York and Milan. I explain how the process works in my companion article "Against Good Taste." Whether you should participate in this negative-sum game is ultimately a question for you to decide. This article is titled "The Truth About Feminine Beauty," not "How To Dig For Gold."

Appendix: survey results.

As I explained in the very first section, beauty surveys are unreliable. I've cited them above in rare cases where I could find no other source of information to answer an interesting question. You shouldn't interpret this inclusion as a confident endorsement.

Logic and solid evidence flow unnoticed through a sewer. Because they're more popular on social media than better sources, it was necessary to use polls for promotion, along with a vivid presentation style that increased visibility. These promotional polls may support my conclusions, but they by no means serve as their basis. For your entertainment, I provide a selection below. Most reached an audience that greatly exceeded my own following.

The trio of polls below show that runway models are barely more attractive to men than impossibly extreme physiques. Men may date them as status symbols, but few actually like them.

I also asked men to rate reader-submitted photos of the most attractive large breasts for shape, ignoring size. Several days later I asked which they believed were fake. I'll share the result to satisfy your curiosity, with no guarantee of accuracy.

Respondents judged about half of the best-shaped breasts in the world to be fake. What's the correct number? You're welcome to make your own guess. Men's top choice in my best butt shape survey (at center) was actually photoshopped, which says a lot about the true value of naturalness.

You might suspect my poll results only reflect the opinions of my following, not the general public. That's a reasonable fear. But by comparing early and late responses to polls that reached a large audience, I've been able to establish that differences between the opinions of my most devoted followers and broader opinion on social media are minor.

Some skeptics still insist that my followers are unusually obsessed with large breasts. But the early and late results to my widely viewed poll on an exceptionally buxom woman's reduction reveal that the general public is actually more keen. The evidence is below.

I still maintain that polls are unreliable data. But my readers aren't to blame. They're actually pretty normal.

I'll conclude with one of my most memorable poll results. I wanted to know whether men’s taste in feminine beauty was related to their taste in other realms of aesthetics. So I asked them to indicate both their preferred body type and their preferred interior design style. The results showed a striking correlation.

Afterword

Perverse social dynamics mean that beauty lies will always persist to some degree. But by sharing this article you can help to spread the truth, and help more women to look their best. That’s good for men and women alike. So if you know someone who might benefit from learning the truth about feminine beauty, please send them a link, or better yet, be brave and post one on your social media account. Feel free to include the eye-catching infographics below, or the even more eye-catching "perfect shape" infographic here.

If you're a male and don't feel comfortable explaining to women what you find attractive, just show them this article instead. And if you need to maintain an air of respectability, share it with a critical comment like, “This piece gets all the facts about feminine beauty right but still somehow totally misses the big picture,” and then go on to explain how you actually prefer average-looking girls. Or, denigrate the article's author as an untrustworthy character while admitting with feigned reluctance that the claims are accurate.

"I normally only date human girls."

The feminine desire to be beautiful and the masculine desire to possess that beauty are basic human drives that should draw men and women together. Yet today liars and profiteers are manipulating them to drive the sexes apart. While the beauty industry and the media lure women toward a false representation of beauty cleverly designed to play on their vanity and ambitions, the sex industry is filling the resulting gap by selling men an empty simulacrum of possession. The foundations of love are being crowded out on both sides.

Unfortunately, the reasoned examination you've read here isn't enough to correct beauty lies on a larger scale. Women's intuitions about feminine beauty are based on the gradual, unconscious assimilation of social cues. By showing young women a vast quantity of fake social cues that are designed to be psychologically potent, modern media has broken their intuitions. It's similar to holding a magnet near a compass.

"The odalisques were lost, somewhere in the realm between wakefulness and sleep, their irises reduced to mirrors reflecting inward the sluggish convulsions of dizzy cranial fauna."

Only a small minority of women are capable of setting aside these broken intuitions, and their pride, to arrive at the truth. To help the deluded majority a massive social movement would be necessary, strong enough to outweigh both the persuasive power of modern media and the everyday lies men tell for convenience. It would have to rely on propagandistic methods like repetition and signaling, not reason. Such a movement is unlikely to arise any time soon.

“There are sex dolls in that article. It just can't be true. And have you seen the font?”

And perhaps it's for the best if it never does. The love and lust that surge up from deep within us are the most audible cries of truth in a society dominated by respectable liars. The truth, you see, hasn't agreed to be respectable in all cases; but the respectable have. So it's fitting that they go through life miming a simulacrum of eros, while beauty remains to the rest of us an open secret, whose querulous call awakens us too to other, quieter truths.

It may be irritating to watch people stubbornly clinging to beauty lies, but keep in mind that you can turn their errors to your advantage. You might even consider this, dear female readers, your induction to a secret society.

Today women are taught that it's wrong to make any effort to please the "male gaze." But the male gaze is the most practically important yardstick for feminine beauty. Women who recognize this and learn what men find attractive have an opportunity to snatch the best mates away from their competitors and build stronger, happier, more lasting relationships.

Long hair can be useful as well as beautiful.

The first and most difficult step is to accept and acknowledge your own faults with good grace. Very few can do this! Then, while other women succumb to illusions and narcissistic delusions, you can get ahead by making use of the information I've presented here. You don't need to convince anyone with words. Men will react to true beauty instinctivelyand you'll win the game that really matters.

"I was already struggling to keep up with my clients’ insistent demands for redheads when an announcement came down to me from the palace—not directly, but through the slave of a messenger of an assistant to the secretary of the Chief Eunuchthat the royal harem required a new source of odalisques, the former supplier being indisposed after his recent beheading."

Good luck, dear female readers. And now that you’re prepared for your new life as an odalisque, it’s time to travel to the Orient!

"My vaunted sales prowess was not so great that I could turn the fashion world upside-down and restore her value to the average odalisque buyer in a single season."

For the remarkable tale of my wicked rise to almost absolute power, including bonus tips for the plundering and profitable resale of Occidental virgins, read my comic novel Memoirs of an Evil Vizier. You may also enjoy my article on beauty lies in the art world: Against Good Taste.

"His master’s master had heard from another slaver, he informed me, that my odalisques might not arrive at the promised time, thus potentially triggering the sultan’s wrath in a manner that would be quite irreversible as far as my personal health was concerned, and he begged me to disabuse him of his well-intentioned concerns regarding the imminent non-existence of my obviously very respectable person."

Dispelling Beauty Lies was written in 2020 and revised and expanded from 2021-2024.

Also by J. Sanilac


An Introduction to My Music

Memoirs of an Evil Vizier

Trust Networks: How We Actually Know Things

Ultrahumanism: How We Can All Win

Critique of the Mind-Body Problem

End Attached Garages Now

A Pragmatical Analysis of Religious Beliefs

Against Good Taste

Amor Fatty

Milgram Questions

The Computer-Simulation Theory Is Silly